Listless Afternoons
by Aria's Locket
Summary: Aang is confused, and Toph is afraid, so the only logical place for them to go in order to avoid personal problems is deep in the Fire Nation where days are long and hot and cares are too high to reach for. Neither expected to find exactly what they were running away from.
1. Part 1

**Title:** Listless Afternoons

**Rating:** T

**Summary:** Aang is confused, and Toph is afraid, so the only logical place for them to go in order to avoid personal problems is deep in the Fire Nation where days are long and hot and cares are too high to reach for. Neither expected to find exactly what they were running away from.

**A/N:** I have a little blurb on my profile as to why I wasn't updating and not answering emails. Basically, I took a LOA from school for some personal issues. I'm fine, but I seriously needed a few months to get my stuff together. I've updated all of my stories and even resurrected one that I had no intention of continuing, so if you're interested definitely check that out.

In the meantime, I found a fanfiction circle at my university! Which I didn't expect, but hey, I'm not complaining. After hearing that I'm shit about updating, others dared me to write a 30,000-word story and post it. So….I did. Hence this beast. It'll be uploaded in parts, so hang tight and enjoy!

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_Part I_

* * *

Aang wasn't expecting much out of his brief "vacation."

Brief was his hope, anyhow. If all things went well and if his heart was the rigid and durable organ that he hoped it was, the visit would be brief. Then, all he would need was some reflective solitude and some time to indulge himself, and he would be back to sorts and willing to start traveling again and fulfilling his duties properly.

"Vacation" was the official name he threw at everyone who knew him for the sake of appearances as well as for trying to make the "solitude" portion of his plan as successful as possible. In reality, he supposed it was more of hibernation. Aang quickly discovered that being so wrapped up in the affairs of the entire world often left his own troubles exposed since he often neglected himself in the process. Perhaps a stretch of rest would give him the faculties necessary to tend to himself for a while.

Zuko had kindly solidified the decision for him. The man—who had lately become just as disturbingly perceptive as his Uncle—immediately picked up on the "spiritual exhaustion" as he was so keen to dub it.

"You do realize that preaching to the Avatar about spiritual clarity is practically sacrilegious, right?" Aang responded to the Fire Lord smartly over dinner one night at the Fire Palace.

Zuko did nothing but smirk and completely disregard the jab. "I was your master for a short time, and I have a right to call you out on your garbage. Plus you only get snarky when something is wrong, so I think I'm right on the money."

Aang opened his arms as if he were offering up to Zuko everything, showing that he had nothing to hide. "There's nothing wrong," he lied, uncomfortable with having someone so attuned to his problems.

The Fire Lord cleared his throat and drank from his goblet. "Don't know if you realized this, but you're a horrid liar and an expert at making your misery obvious."

The monk frowned and pushed his food around on his plate like a child. "I thought I was spiritually exhausted. Now I'm miserable. Which is it?"

"One or both," Zuko responded cryptically. "I can't tell. But you working yourself to the bone won't help matters. Don't know what happened to you, but you need to fix yourself. You've been in a rut the entire visit here."

A rut. Interesting. Apparently for a pacifist like Aang to be in a sarcastic and tetchy mood was reason for a whole intervention. Why was he the only one not allowed to have mood swings and emotional fits? "You're not going to explain to me what kind of rut it is?" Aang muttered into his goblet.

Zuko grinned with his teeth and smiled charmingly at Aang. "Well that would defeat the purpose of your mandatory introspection, now wouldn't it?"

Mandatory as deemed by the Fire Lord himself. Since Aang was on Fire Nation soil and had no legal jurisdiction over the Fire Lord, Zuko was just short of pulling out a scroll of Fire Nation laws just to prove to Aang that _yes_ he _could_ force him to take a leave of absence before their scheduled meetings and consultations took place. Aang learned to never argue with Zuko. If there was one thing about him that never changed since the first time they laid eyes on each other, it was that Zuko was persistent to the point of it being an illness. Plus, as much as Aang tried not to show it, he and Zuko were pretty much on the same page.

It took Aang packing his bag and setting off without any of his usual sources of comfort and familiarity to make him realize just how absorbed he was in his job and how much he had neglected spending time with himself. If being away from signing papers and ending disputes filled him with such anxiety and made him feel so disconnected from everything around him, maybe he had been pushing himself too hard. But why had that started? He would have to figure that out.

His likelihood of recognition was lowest in the Fire Nation since many of the places he visited in the Fire Nation had been in disguise. While everyone knew of the Avatar, he was confident that not many small cities in the Fire Nation would be able to pick him out by face. Fire Fountain City—or North Chung-Ling as it was now referred to since that awful Ozai statue had been knocked down—was the first city that came to mind. It was a middle class industrial city that seemed inconspicuous enough for his purposes.

Clad in a black cloak and a cap that hid his arrow, Aang walked into the first hotel he happened to run into. Thinking that leaving Appa in the Fire Palace stables was a better idea so that he wouldn't be so conspicuous, Aang took a variety of trains and long walks to get to the city.

"Hello, sir. How can I help you?" the female receptionist greeted when he finally entered the hotel.

Aang cleared his throat and fiddled with his long sleeves. "Yes, I'd like to reserve a single room, please," he asked.

"Name?"

"Kuzon," Aang replied automatically, falling back to lean on his old alias. "Just Kuzon."

The receptionist nodded and looked behind her at a rack lined with keys. "Hm, for how long, hon?"

The monk faltered for a moment and looked down at the cracks in the wood. He hadn't really intended on putting a timeframe on this little trip of his, and he would hate to have to end it early before he was ready. "Um…well."

When the woman didn't get an immediate reply, she turned away from the board and leaned her elbows on the counter in between the two of them. "Not here for any particular reason, are you?"

Aang looked up, shocked at the woman's intuitiveness, but then realized that she probably dealt with stragglers like him all the time. He could do nothing but nod and shrug his shoulders. The woman smirked at him and turned back to retrieve an old brass key from the top.

"How about this?" the receptionist compromised. "I'll write down that you checked in today. You pay a two silver piece down payment, tell me when you're ready to leave, and you'll pay then. We don't get much business around here, so I don't mind renting out a room for a bit," she smiled at him warmly. "That sound okay?"

Aang couldn't help but grin back and nod his head in relief, already starting to dig into his pockets for the coins he needed. "Yes, that would be lovely. Thank you very much."

"Nah, no need to be so formal," the woman waved off as she turned to press the key on the countertop. "Enjoy your stay. You're in 304 on the third floor. Oh, and be careful going out at night. This city can get a little seedy after sundown."

"Oh, of course," Aang promised. He was sure he could probably scrap his way out of an altercation if he needed to, but he appreciated the warning. He doubted very much he would be wandering around the city at night much anyway.

After leaving the money on the counter, Aang leaned down to collect his two bags before the woman above him tapped on the counter to get his attention. He looked up and saw the woman gesturing to one of the doors behind Aang in the lobby.

"Listen, uh…technically I'm not supposed to do this, but you look like you need it. If you jiggle the handle to the left and push down when you pull it, it'll pop right open. Leads up the roof if you ever need a place to clear your head." She winked at him, and disappeared into the room behind the counter.

Aang stood crouched on the floor next to his bags and turned towards the door. Honestly, flying around the city on his glider would have been a better opportunity to clear his head and probably would work better. Flying on Appa even more so. But he swore to leave all the bending and so-called "Avatar Stuff" back at the Fire Nation when he promised Zuko he'd come back and deal with business once he was clear headed enough to handle all of his responsibilities again. Standing four stories high on top of a building didn't quite measure up, but he supposed if he was offered some sanctuary he should probably take the opportunity and see if it helped him any. Any sort of fresh air at this point might click something into place for him.

The hotel wasn't very large from what he could see. There were only four floors and eight rooms to a floor, and the rooms themselves were nothing special. Aang didn't mind the quaint accommodations seeing as how he had dealt with much less when he was traveling during the war. There were no frills: just a bed, a window, a closet, and a desk. Aang opened the drawer to the desk and saw an old candle bra with about five or so fresh candles. He'd probably have to go out and buy more. Maybe he could pick up a few books or something to keep himself occupied on the days he didn't feel like leaving.

"That'll probably be often," he muttered to himself sadly. He wasn't sure he'd be able to push himself to do more than just take a short walk around the city or maybe go out for a quick bite to eat. No plays, festivals, or carnivals for him. It'd probably bring up too much baggage for him to handle.

Aang spent the rest of the afternoon unpacking the few essentials that he had brought with him. He only managed to fill up a quarter of the closet and dropped his bags haphazardly on top of the desk. He lay down on the bed—not very comfortable but he supposed he could deal with it—with his hands behind his head and stared up at the ceiling for about a good hour before he began to feel restless. He tried closing his eyes for a bit and doing some light meditation, but the stuffy room and the itchy sheets and the hard bed proved to be too much of a distraction for him to concentrate properly. Besides, he knew that he had some serious thinking to do first and meditation wasn't going to help him to forget that.

He switched positions on the old bed a few times before he sighed and swung his feet over the edge. He must have been brooding for a while, because the window was already painted black and the room was pretty much pitch dark. Sleep wasn't coming to him, and right now, that tip the receptionist gave him sounded lovely.

**OOO**

Of course, whenever Aang strayed from his normal tract, he found that strange things started happening.

Obviously when one wakes up on the back of a legendary lion turtle, one can't expect for things to continue on like a regular Sunday morning. By the same token, Aang couldn't expect that trying to abscond himself in every humanly way possible was going to yield results that were anything short of abnormal and, to be frank, impossible in any other context.

Somehow, he knew the brunette sitting on the edge of the roof later on that night was someone that he knew. Aang was always good at picking up airs of familiarity from others. But what shook him was not that he was sure he knew this person, but rather that he knew this person was probably up here for much the same reason that he was if the hunched shoulders and the lost faraway look in her eyes as she stared out at the dark city below her were any indication. If there were a few things that Aang knew well, they were grief, loss, and confusion. He'd had to live with at least one of them during most of his life, and by now he was an expert at picking them out. All three were written all over her.

Aang kept his cap on and quietly approached the edge of the building, making sure that he didn't startle the girl and make her fall. Though, if his hunch was right and they usually were, he was positive that he didn't need to worry about startling this particular girl.

He was standing several feet away from her and staring out at the skyline when he spoke. "Did the front desk clue you in on this place, too?"

Aang wasn't looking straight at her, but out of the corner of his eye, he saw her cock her head towards him, but not completely turn his way. For a while, there was complete silence and Aang was sure that he probably intruded upon something personal and shouldn't have said anything. He probably wouldn't have appreciated it himself had it happened to him. But after a few minutes, she nodded. "Yeah. Apparently taking in woebegone teenagers is this place's specialty."

The monk tilted his head and smirked at the skyline. "You'll admit to that?"

The girl shrugged. "Well. Who am I to question what I can't see?"

Aang's eyes darted to the left quickly and didn't leave the girl this time. "So you believe it?"

"Do you?"

He laughed humorlessly. "I'm often told that I'm horrible at clueing in on my own torment."

"Well, I'll second that," she replied with a familiar snarky smirk.

"Would it be rude of me to second the blind comment while we're at it?"

That seemed to pull a genuine laugh out of her, despite how horribly short lived it turned out to be. She propped one foot up on the ledge and leaned her elbow on her knee. Her sea-foam green eyes stared sightlessly at the skyline once more, but her posture seemed to have relaxed just slightly. "I'll let you have it just once 'cause you're still my lily-livered student."

Aang mocked a look of hurt. "Lily-livered? After all we've been through? I'm crushed, Sifu."

She did nothing but shrug in that noncommittal way she did whenever she told a mean joke but didn't really care whom it annoyed or embarrassed. If Aang was counting correctly, he hadn't seen Toph for about a year. This was before Toph decided to stay permanently at her parent's home until further notice and before Aang spent eight months dealing with the Earth King at Ba Sing Se and doing damage control.

The last time they saw each other was at Zuko and Mai's wedding in the Fire Nation amidst about a week's worth of partying and celebrating. Nearly every night the two friends shared many dances, hung out on the balcony with a few drinks, and even stood on a roof much like this one shooting little pebbles down at the drunkards on the ground and laughing at their confusion. Life was simpler back then. Aang was relaxed and wonderfully happy with Katara, Sokka and Suki were engaged, Zuko was married, and Toph and her parents had finally patched things up with each other and built up a pretty understanding and stable relationship. Plus, last he heard, she was running around with a dapper Earth Kingdom noble that her mother had introduced her to and was practically ecstatic with the arrangement.

How things had changed.

Toph stared right over Aang's shoulder and patted the ground next to her. He smiled gently and carefully settled himself right on the edge. Figuring that the disguise was no longer necessary, Aang removed his cap and shrugged off the long sleeve shirt he was wearing, leaving himself in a cooler, sleeveless tunic he had on underneath.

The noble lifted one brow at the action, a skill that Aang was never able to do himself but always found very endearing. "Going shirtless on a late night stroll?"

"No," Aang scowled. "Have to cover up the arrows, but it gets hot even during the Fall. I've got something on underneath, don't worry."

"You were doing just fine when you were twelve," Toph commented offhandedly.

"Are you kidding?" Aang asked incredulously. "I was always sweating bullets in those clothes." Toph would know that pretty well. She was always the one who would tease him about the fact that Aang had to wash his clothes almost daily since he sweated through the long sleeves on a regular basis.

She smirked at the memory and nudged her elbow with his, the most tame and non-violent form of affection he had ever seen her express towards him. He wasn't sure if that was cause for elation or worry, all things considered. He was glad that he was able to cheer up his friend to some degree, but of course there was no forgetting the right state he had found her in staring off into space like she had no where to go and no one to confide in. Moments ago, he felt a similar tug at his heart, and he couldn't help but wonder how absolutely convoluted fate was being lately if this combination of circumstances and events led them to this spot. Surely, there was a fluke in the system, because he couldn't understand why they deserved this.

Once the smiles and chuckles died down, he couldn't help but ask the obvious question. "Why are you here? Really?"

It was frightening how quickly her shoulders hunched back over and how quickly the vacancy in her eyes took over when she was reminded of things she probably didn't want to be reminded of. "I was suffocating. I came out here to breathe."

Such a simple couple of sentences strung together, but it all seemed so surreal to him that he wasn't sure if he was dreaming or just coming upon a strange coincidence.

"What about you?" she asked him.

Aang sighed and blinked at a star that was hanging over his head. "This is the closest I could get to flying."

If there was one thing that Aang had learned about Toph over the years, it was that she hated talking about personal things. Getting her to admit to something that had anything to do with her feelings or emotions was harder than pulling teeth, so it was too much for Aang to expect her to start explaining what she was _really_ doing in a city like this. What made him really laugh was that neither was particularly shocked to see the other. Aang supposed it was because it was just too natural for them to always wind up finding each other in some way. They were friends for so long and had experienced so much together, it did make sense that they wouldn't totally get rid of each other. If the war taught all of them one thing, it was that nothing was a surprise anymore: not even finding Toph on the roof of his hotel after a whole year.

Aang pushed for vague questions for the sake of filling up the silence. "How long are you staying?"

The girl shook her head and hugged her knees closer to her chest. "Don't know. When I'm ready to leave I guess. It might take some time." Toph seemed adamant on not eluding to what that "it" was that was keeping her here, but Aang kindly reminded himself that he probably didn't want to go into his own mess either.

"Why North Chung-Ling? Last time I checked, you nearly ran this town bankrupt with your antics a few years ago."

Toph smiled sadly at the memory. "Yeah, you remember that, huh?"

"Of course. I was involved, I'm embarrassed to say," Aang chuckled.

"Eh, you had fun, admit it," Toph nudged him gently again. "But think about it: who would expect me to come back here? Plus everywhere else was out of the question."

"How so?"

Toph brought her thumbnail to her mouth. "Can't get to the Air Temples if I'm not you. Earth Kingdom is too obvious. Water Tribes are completely out of the question. I'd be on ice and have to wear shoes lest I get frostbite. Then I'd really be a little blind girl stuck in the dark." She gestured out to the city underneath them. "So the Fire Nation it was."

Aang shrugged, slightly amused that he had similarly knocked out all of the same places, just for different reasons. "I guess it's not a horrible place for catharsis."

Toph hummed. "How do you know it's for catharsis?"

"Why else come to the one city in the Fire Nation you know everyone would expect you to avoid?" he explained. "Plus, you look wound up over something."

She scowled at that comment and curled further in on herself. "Don't assume anything. I'm fine."

Aang knew he hit the nail on the head. Just as he suspected. The minute her emotions were even hinted at in a conversation, her body language practically reeked of defensiveness. She was reaching her limit, and if he pushed too much she knew that she would completely shut him out and then he would never learn anything. Considering her mood, it was a miracle that she decided to speak this much. Her presence here was mysterious and unexplained, but he supposed that it was a nice change of pace. Maybe having some company here was better for him. Sitting for hours alone in his room certainly didn't accomplish anything, and he was sure that keeping up the anti-social behavior for the duration of his stay wouldn't yield any positive results either.

They were silent for a few minutes before Aang spoke in a soft voice. "It's getting late. You should go to bed."

The girl sighed out in a way that made her breathe shake and her shoulder tremble. It was far too hot outside for it to be a chill from the cold. Suddenly, Aang felt like leaving Toph alone for a year was probably the worst decision he could have ever made. Toph shook her head and drummed her fingers on her elbows. "I don't sleep much lately."

Aang tilted his head and rolled his tongue over his teeth in thought. He stared down at the street below at a group of young boys carrying pieces of glass, sticks, and rocks and scowled darkly at the scene. "Yeah. Me neither."

**OOO**

"Alright, then, dearie." An old, stout woman with silver hair piled in a bun on the back of her head entered the small room in the back of the shop and smiled warmly at the patient in front of her. "Kuzon, you said your name was, right?"

Aang nodded and coughed to clear his throat. "Uh, yes ma'am."

"Wonderful, wonderful," she muttered to herself, opening some of the cabinets that were lined along the walls of the room they were both sitting in. Aang glanced briefly and saw that they were mostly filled with jars, mortars, and pestles with various herbs and plants that she probably prescribed to patients when they came to her with various ailments. "Can you pay, sweetheart?"

The monk scoffed and rolled his eyes. For a warmhearted healer, she was sure getting to the point. He was sure she turned people away with no money before she was able to attend to them. So much for being treated nicely. Aang reached into his pocket and pulled out a small handful of coins that he was sure would more than cover the cost of a simple consultation with a healer that probably wouldn't be able to do anything.

The healer smiled and picked up each of the coins carefully, holding them up to the light and counting them twice to make sure that he had paid her in full. Once she was satisfied, she nodded to herself and locked the money away in a small box she kept on the counter. She turned back to him and sat down on a hard backed chair right in front of Aang and folded her hands in her lap. "Well, then," she gestured between the two of them. "How can I help you?"

Aang scratched the back of his neck and looked towards his feet. "Just, uh…trouble sleeping, I guess."

"Ah," the woman nodded sagely. "Insomnia. You poor thing, wicked thing to have to deal with, not sleeping," the healer cooed in a voice that Aang was sure just laced with mock compassion. She returned to the cabinets filled with herbs. "How long has this been going on, dearie?"

Aang blinked and tried to count back. "I'd have to guess about two weeks."

The healer hummed to herself and stared quizzically at the cabinet in front of her. "Hasn't happened to you before, has it?"

Aang shook his head and laced his hands together on his lap, looking and feeling like a little boy stuck in a healer's rooms because he had the flu or was having stomach pains. "No, never." Aang winced. "Well…there was this one time a few years ago where I refused to sleep. But, that fixed itself in a matter of days." More like his friends practically spent all day constructing a heavenly wonderland of sheep's wool just to force him to calm the hell down for two seconds and take a nap before he trained himself into exhaustion, but he left that part out.

"What caused that, do you think?" the healer asked.

"I guess stress," he replied vaguely. Stress was an understatement. Constant fear and paranoia of failing everyone in the world, getting hurt, losing his friends, and leading to the demise and take over of the planet was a more accurate description. But if he was going to think of this from a medical standpoint, it definitely was unhealthy amounts of stress.

"Well, that sounds like the culprit this time," the healer replied, now starting to pick out some herbs from jars and a few oils from small bowls. "Those who have trouble sleeping but have no history of the ailment are often plagued with stress." After setting the materials down on the counter, she turned back to him and stared at him critically. "Did anything particularly stressful happen around two weeks ago?"

_Yes, as a matter of fact something did_, Aang thought immediately, but he didn't really think that would chalk up to lack of sleep. Besides, what did a healer need to know about that for? "Nothing really that I can think of…it's been pretty tame lately. Maybe I'm sick."

The healer scoffed, cracking the warm grandmotherly act she was trying to implement as part of her pitch—well, Aang was assuming from here on out that it was a pitch. "You're not sick, but you are lying. Terribly, too. Now come on. I need to know to see if it's for any serious medical reason."

Aang rubbed his neck and looked up at the ceiling when he confessed, "I mean, my girlfriend and I did break up around that time, but I don't really think that's—"

"Oh my goodness, of _course_ that's means for stress!" the woman gasped dramatically. Aang rolled his eyes.

"I am so sorry," she apologized. "And for what it's worth, an attractive young man like you doesn't deserve to go through such trauma. I can't imagine what it must be like to spend sleepless night constantly wondering where things went wrong and what you could have possible done to deserve something like this…"

She was laying it on very thick, and it was far too obvious that she was being a gigantic phony about her attempts towards comfort and sympathy. Suddenly, he really wanted to just forget he ever came here, get up, and march straight back to his hotel and suffer through the sleepless nights for however long it took for them to finally go away. The childhood crush thing didn't work out quite like he thought it would, and people caught wind of it almost immediately. People latched onto juicy gossip like the Avatar and his Waterbending master breaking it off after so many good years. Aang, however, was never a fan of such entertainment and hated bringing it up and fueling the fire, even in the midst of anonymity.

Despite the act, the healer seemed to really think this was the problem and was starting to lug over so many herbs and incenses that would supposedly help him deal with and accept his breakup. Aang kind of just wanted to forget about it and pretend it never happened. He had been doing a pretty good job of that until now.

"The key is relaxation," the healer continued on. "These teas over here are lovely for calming the nerves and balancing your energy. Lighting some of these herbs at night will create a much more comfortable and warming environment when you're about to go to sleep. It's all about embracing the natural remedies and allowing your body to heal on its own pace without any abnormal or abrasive methods. Now, in addition—"

Aang stopped her quickly. "Listen," he muttered. "I'm, er, sure that all of this would work swell and that it's the better route, but I was actually hoping for something a little more reliable. Stronger, if you will."

The healer kept playing stupid. "Why, I have no idea what you mean? Stronger than all of this?"

The monk groaned. He knew what sorts of things healers sold in the Fire Nation, so he knew she knew exactly what he was talking about. But lucky for him, he just happened to wander into a money hungry establishment. Aang dug through his pockets and started fingering out more coins. "I'm almost positive you have an understanding with the apothecary across the street," Aang stated, jutting his chin towards the establishment across the street with signs displaying all sorts of sales on different types of tonics and solutions. He pulled out a hefty amount of money. "I'm sure there's something else you can give me."

The healer kept her eyes wide and shocked until they quickly hardened and a smirk twisted onto her face. "Now how did a boy like you know about that?"

Aang shrugged. "Very observant."

The healer chuckled, turned around, and opened a large cabinet before undoing the large latch she kept on it. She shuffled through a few small bottles that were kept on the many shelves inside before pulling out a small box filled with about ten vials.

She pulled out one to show him. "Sleeping draught. A pretty powerful one that should help you sleep through the night. This is enough for about a month."

"Does it work?" he asked skeptically.

"Should," she replied. "Apothecary guaranteed it."

Aang stared at the bottles. "Any side effects?"

"Not this," she explained. "If you want anything stronger, I guess I could show them to you. But I can't account for what those will do to you. A small spoonful of this should give you a nice dreamless sleep."

Dreamless, huh? That sounded pretty good as an added perk. Not that he expected any to come to him at night, but not having to deal with any troubling dreams sounded almost too perfect. "I'll take them."

The healer shrugged and closed the case before handing it off to him. "In all honesty…getting out a bit more might help too. You shouldn't grow too dependent on those. They'll mess up your sleep cycle if you're on them for too long."

"But you're selling me a month's worth," Aang commented dryly as he packed them away into his satchel.

"Irrelevant," she brushed off. "But I do mean what I say. Company helps when you're stressed out."

Aang frowned. "So do sleeping draughts."

She chortled into her hand. "Yeah, that too. Have a nice day."

Aang carefully placed the bottles into his bag and slipped out of the shop. He tried to walk carefully so that they didn't clink against each other and garner too much attention. He was sure that a noise like that coming from his bag would no doubt sound a little suspicious.

As he weaved through the people, Aang realized with a groan that despite his desire to be alone during this little excursion of his, everything seemed to contradict that wish. Just when he thought he could just stay holed up in his room all day and think and brood, now the healer was telling him that sleep couldn't solve everything, and that he needed to get out more. He decided to shrug that off for now though. Perhaps he'll take advantage of it if he ever needed to go out and buy something. Maybe he'd even start some small talk with a sales clerk or something. That counted as socializing, right?

The other instance of shock was of course the example of cosmic intervention that managed to pluck Toph from whatever fabric of time she was supposed to be occupying right now, and stuck her right smack dab in the middle of his mental cleansing. That couldn't have been a coincidence, could it? Stranger things have happened to him, and being the Avatar usually taught him to take instances like this seriously. Plus it wasn't like he was just going to pretend that she wasn't around. This was _Toph_. Added to the fact that he hadn't really seen her look so dejected and broken—not even when he almost abandoned her at her parent's house—he knew he really couldn't afford to maintain any semblance of peace and quiet. His curiosity wouldn't allow it.

Oh well. Mission aborted.

He supposed the next logical step was to at least figure out what on Earth Toph of all people needed to run away from, seeing as how she spent most of her life hiding and running. He wasn't too optimistic in that department, but it would be worse just leaving her to her devices and remaining eternally curious as towards her intentions. Besides, could he honestly really ignore her for the sake of some desperate attempt at reestablishing normality? He wasn't going to start kidding himself.

Aang stopped at an old bookstore and managed to pick up a couple of short novels that he promised himself he would read. When meditating failed and when company seemed almost physically sickening, he was sure that he would appreciate the little distraction. He had to admit, ever since the war ended, he really hadn't read or written much of anything that didn't have to do with legalities. Perhaps this would be a nice change of pace.

The walk back to the hotel was entirely uneventful, and the monk was filled with a newfound purpose of curling up in bed with some books, dosing himself into oblivion, and forgetting the day ever happened. He'd deal with pesky things like emotions tomorrow. Yes, that sounded like a good plan.

Aang was about to greet the kind receptionist that was situated behind the desk before he noticed that she was busy dealing with a customer who was leaning over the desk holding a handkerchief with something inside. He walked past them and began heading for the stairs up to his floor.

"Are you sure, hon?" the receptionist asked, falling back into the motherly pet name that she probably reused with a lot of people. "You never know when you might need them."

"I promise you I'm not going to need them. Walking around in the dark doesn't make a difference to me. Besides, they're just taking up drawer space."

The monk's forehead creased and he clicked his tongue against his teeth as he stood in the doorway perplexed at the sight of the blind girl making another appearance. How many more times was this going to happen?

Something was definitely different though. The Toph last night looked lost and thoughtful. It was definitely out of character, but almost endearing in its unfamiliarity. The shoulders were more hunched today, the hair was a little bit more limp, and there was just the lightest dusting of dark circles underneath her eyes. She was also banging her fist against her forearm—a habit that he learned a while ago meant that she was trying to keep herself awake. She didn't look like she had gotten any sleep last night, and suddenly he was even more intrigued than he was before.

Immediately remembering that he forgot to pick up more candles like he said he would before he returned, Aang figured he would use the situation to his advantage and kill two birds with one stone.

He cleared his throat and gained the attention of the two women. As Toph turned, he could clearly see the exhaustion from her frown to her dulled eyes. He pretended not to notice. "If you don't mind, I needed extra candles anyway. I could take them off your hands for you if you want," Aang offered. He didn't bother identifying himself. Toph knew who he was.

Aang wasn't sure why he was expecting a scathing comment or at least some reluctance. There was no need for Toph to do so. They were just candles—candles that she didn't want, no less. But he was so used to her lethal repartee that he unconsciously built himself up for a pleasant argument in her presence. That's why it surprised him when Toph merely lifted her shoulders gently and closed her eyes in a passive acceptance that Aang didn't think he had ever seen her do in his entire life—ever.

She closed up the handkerchief and handed them to Aang. He briefly looked down at her fingers and couldn't help but stare at the way her skin stretched across her bony knuckles and made her already pale skin look positively translucent. He remembered his hands used to look the same whenever he was stressed and could only nibble at his food. He felt the involuntary urge to run the pads of his fingers over them.

She allowed the corners of her mouth to lift slightly in a very small, very forced smile. "Thanks," she muttered quietly.

The noble didn't look like she really wanted to converse any longer, although she didn't pull her hand away immediately. He wouldn't label the lingering as anything emotional, but he wondered if it was because her fingertips were so cold, and the palm of his hand—which always gave off this residual warmth ever since he started Firebending—was a welcoming feeling. He certainly felt a small chill when their hands connected.

The moment faded quickly and Toph was about to turn around and do who knew what. Mope. Sit around. Not sleep. Get thinner. Get colder. Get quieter. All things that were quintessentially _not Toph_. So he grabbed her hand in his own and pulled her back to him.

A small part of his mind bemoaned the fact that she didn't collide with his chest like the romance scrolls always said. Although, why he would be imagining something like that was beyond him and chose to simply ignore it for later analysis. The girl's eyes widened and it was only at this distance that he noticed that the cloudy orbs were just the slightest bit pink and swollen. He didn't want to even think what that meant and started speaking before he could stop and think it through first. Impulsive Firebender nature. It must have been amplified because he was in the Fire Nation.

"Do you want to hang out tomorrow?" he asked in a rush of words that slurred themselves together. "Not anything major or anything just…maybe we could go out to eat or…watch a show. They have shows here in town, did you know? Or we don't have to do any of that. We could just walk around and, I dunno, talk, or…I guess…"

Aang trailed off, realizing how completely unprepared he was. Sokka always told him that when he was nervous and impulsive, he rattled on like a psycho and no one could ever understand him. The horrible delivery aside, he hoped that she would agree. Toph was different Stranger. More cut off. Plus, in addition to the awful tonics he had been given, the healer had suggested he get up and do something. Loathed as he was to admit it, the idea sounded nice when the prospect of hanging out with Toph again after a whole year presented itself to him. Had everything been normal and friendly and familiar, he probably would have asked the same thing of her. But because of all the mismatched events and facts that were slowly culminating around him, this seemed more vital.

Her mouth cracked open, and he was so so sure that she was going to agree to have an exciting day together like they used to. But, her words visibly faltered and her mouth shut closed with a small sigh.

Toph shook her head. "Look, Twinkles, I…I mean it sounds nice but…I think I'm getting kind of sick from not sleeping much. I sort of wanted to turn in early and at least lay down for a bit before my headache comes back. Maybe some other time."

Aang was about to stop her and say that he could walk her to her room at least and get her anything she needed, but she had already scurried up the stairs and out of sight before Aang could even finish thinking the words.

**OOO**

"You know, you're kinda pissing me off."

Aang wondered if she was purposefully subdued in the midst of company. She was so quiet and almost timid in front of the receptionist earlier in the day, but the moment the sun went down and they were all alone, her bite came back. Unfortunately, when it came to her appearance, not much had changed.

The monk did nothing but chuckle and run his hand along the stubble that was growing along his jaw with a frown. He was usually really good about remembering to shave. "And why is that, my dear?" he teased her.

Toph was always short, but she looked absolutely tiny curled up into a ball with her knees to her chest. It was like she was barely there. For some reason, this worried him.

"You're always interrupting my free time," she grumbled into her pants. "This is the second time in as many days. Find a hobby."

The insults flew right through him since he had already gotten himself used to Toph's less than pleasant nature, quickly picking it up as her only known method of communicating with others without properly letting them know how she was really feeling. A clever little tactic if not completely ineffectual.

"Funny," he commented, shrugging off his tunic and remaining in a sleeveless undershirt that was much much cooler. "But I seem to recall paying to stay at this hotel. That means that I have every right to occupy whatever area of this hotel I so choose—including the roof. We just happen to both come here at around the same time and have horrible sleep schedules." Horrible was a gross understatement. Practically nonexistent was more like it.

Toph tried to scowl, but the expression was broken by a yawn. She spoke through it with her mouth wide open. "Smart ass."

Aang chuckled and tilted his head in a mocking fashion. "Getting sleepy there, kiddo?"

"Well, damn, maybe I could go downstairs and get some sleep if you would buzz off and leave me alone," Toph snarled.

The jab didn't do much to Aang who had already learned when to back away from Toph and when to realize when the girl was being defensive and closed off. Anyway, if he happened to push a little too hard and piss her off to the point of no return, maybe the punch she will undoubtedly throw at his jaw will knock him out and give him a good night's rest. She'll probably leave him outside and on the roof to bear the elements alone, but he figured he'd risk it.

Walked with his hands behind his back, he looked up and tried to pull a small talk topic from the air to lighten the mood. "You know, I heard from a very reliable source that increased activity improves the inability to sleep," Aang said breezily, pulling inspiration from that phony healer of all people. "Maybe if you agree to go with me somewhere, you wouldn't be so cranky."

That was clearly not the right thing to say, or Toph was really that tired that she immediately latched onto the one part of his statement that she could use against him to get Aang to go back downstairs in his small hotel room and never speak to her again. "For your information, I came here so that I can do whatever I want without people breathing down my neck. I can spend my days doing whatever the fuck I want and I don't need you coming up here to preach to me on how to relax. So just do me a favor and get the hell out of here, huh?"

Aang's face was passive and he raised both of his eyebrows, since he wasn't Toph and could never will the muscles in his face to lift just one of them. It usually made him looked shocked and disinterested instead of mocking, which is when he really tended to use it. However, in this context it seemed to work well even though Toph couldn't see it. It let him build up the proper mood and reaction.

He coughed uncomfortably. "Well, I guess trying to offer friendly advice from one insomniac to another was a little presumptuous and rude on my part. Honestly, where have my manners gone?" Aang drawled sarcastically, a skill he learned from Zuko that he found was rather effective when dealing with the Earthbender. "I'll just go and leave you to stare sleeplessly into the skyline. Let me know when it starts working."

Maybe Zuko was right. Maybe he was in a bad mood. All this sarcasm and brutal honesty was starting to pile up and become seriously effective. If he wasn't careful he might keep talking like this all the time. Then again, if it got Toph to lift her head in shock and turn to face him—which it did—maybe he'd need to keep it up for just a bit longer.

Aang did a little victory dance on the inside after finally getting Toph's attention, and completed the statement with a sharp one hundred and eighty degree turn and a confident saunter back towards the roof to the door.

He didn't even get to walk ten paces before he felt Toph's body shift on her perch on the edge of the roof and call out to him. "Hold on a second…"

Aang smirked to himself and couldn't help break into a wide grin at the sound of her calling him back. He squared his features and turned back around, facing her with his hands in his pockets. He shrugged his shoulders, urging her to continue with what she was about to say, looking like the epitome of blasé.

Toph bit her lip for a few seconds and let it unfurl from her teeth. It came out looking redder and fuller, adding a bit of color to her face that was missing before. Aang couldn't help but stare at it as she spoke.

"Sorry," she grumbled, almost as if she were reluctant to have to actually realize that she owed someone an apology for once. "It's just…not a good day, you know?"

Aang nodded. He did know. His day had been nothing to write home about either. If anything, he sort of wanted to sit around and mope around about it to if only he knew it would actually solve anything. "Can I sit?"

She was already shuffling to the left along the edge of the roof and patted the space next to her before he even finished the question. She brought the very tip of her thumb against her lips and sighed as he carefully maneuvered himself so that he wouldn't accidently pitch himself off the edge. No need to embarrass himself by doing some hasty last minute bending just to save himself from doing something stupid.

He didn't think to initiate the conversation, thinking that he would probably screw up the conversation and lead to a repeat introduction of Toph's ire again. So he leaned his elbows on his knees and stared out at the darkening skyline until Toph turned her head and spoke. "So insomnia, huh? I thought you were kidding about the sleeping thing yesterday."

Aang shook his head and scratched along his jaw. "Nope. Haven't slept in weeks. Can't seem to fall out to save my life. Your body wants you to sleep so badly, but your brain just shuts out the messages and keeps you wide awake."

The Earthbender frowned and lowered her thumb. "Stray thoughts?"

"Not even," Aang answered. "I'm not preoccupied with anything. Nothing's keeping me up. It just doesn't come. There's a connection that isn't being made."

"You don't know that," Toph responded, resting her chin in the palm of her hand. "Unconsciously, you could be seriously bothered with something. Anything happen in the past year since I've seen you?"

Aang smirked at her question and immediately picked up on the little trick. "Will you promise to divulge the same information if I tell you?"

The girl scowled and blew a piece of hair out of her face. "How slick. Touché."

"Thank you."

Toph blinked her eyes quickly three times, and each time the tips of her eyelashes just barely brushed against her cheekbones, which were always unusually high for a girl. She started banging her fist against her forearm again and started widening her eyes in a vain attempt to keep them from dropping shut in the middle of one of her sentences.

Aang stared at her critically and asked, "So are you the same? Can't seem to fall asleep?"

She shook her head roughly, half to disagree with Aang and half to shake out the drowsiness curling into her brain like a thick fog that wasn't letting up. "I could fall asleep if I wanted to. At least I think so. But that's not the problem."

The monk frowned. "Then what's the problem?" He could barely stomach not being able to sleep. What on earth must it have been like to not _want_ to sleep? Why would someone ever wish to torture themselves like that? Surely she was exaggerating.

Toph took her two thumbnails and started picking at them, making sharp clicking sounds that seemed very loud in comparison to the oddly silent night. "It's complicated, Twinkle Toes."

He stuck out his elbow and nudged her gently. "An eye for an eye, Sifu. You promised."

"No I didn't."

"You prefaced the conversation by suggesting you would embellish your last statement. That's practically a blood oath."

Toph sucked her lips in, refusing to speak and sealing her lips shut. But Aang already knew the signs, because damn it all if he couldn't read Toph like a preschool book at this point. She always kept things bottled up, definitely. But he knew his urge to want to desperately tell someone what was bothering him was also embedded into her, just with slightly different wiring. All it took was some simple prodding and very careful conversing and he could get her to admit anything.

After the rugged Sifu-student relationship dissolved after the completion of the war, the two of them fell into this comfortable and easy friendship that melded together almost seamlessly. He hadn't quite realized how easy it was to talk to her about Katara, or how quickly she spoke to him about everything her parents ever said to her that made her scream and kick and cry.

He even remembered one night, during the week long wedding, they were sitting on the roof of the Fire Palace after sharing countless dances and officially scaring away all of the drunkards on the ground below them. Toph was falling asleep and was leaning against his shoulder, something that Aang didn't think she had ever done—not even with Sokka, and she had a _serious _crush on him. He knew because he told her. But that night, when he was sure she was asleep and when he was close to dozing off himself, she heard her speak quietly.

"_You know, I think the two of us can actually give this a try."_

_Aang turned his head towards her, but wound up just pressing his lips lightly against the crown of her head instead. If Toph noticed the action, she didn't respond to it. "What's this?"_

"_You know the whole falling in love thing," she explained. "You with Sweetness, and me with the guy I was telling you about."_

"_The son of that dude?"_

_Toph laughed and nodded. "Yeah, him. But seriously, I…I sort of didn't think we had it in us."_

"_What do you mean?" Aang questioned. _

_The girl shrugged and adjusted her position on Aang's shoulder so that her nose was just underneath his chin. "We were so distracted with the war. You lost so much. And me…well, I never really figured out the whole 'getting close to people' thing. But we did okay." _

_Aang nodded. She was right on the money. Some days he would sit in his bed and stare up at the sky and just think about the vastness of the time he had lost and the people he had missed. Everyone he had ever known—every drop of his blood—was gone in an instant, and he now shouldered the pressure of maintaining that blood and letting it spread and grow. He had an entire nation worth of living to make up for, since in the back of his mind he had always felt slightly responsible. He wanted to love enough, laugh enough, and cry enough for everyone he had ever lost. While the feelings for Katara were there and he didn't doubt them in the least, he was always reluctant of his success in such an endeavor. Would he be able to handle it?_

_Toph was always a different story. After spending years and years of being stunted and ignored, there was always this passionate need to prove something: mainly that she was independent and that she needed no one to hand hold her. It was why she was willing to practically sever her family ties and risk losing their hearts forever by hitting them where it really hurt just to prove to anyone that was close enough to hear her scream that she was strong and she needed no one. Aang couldn't imagine how hard it had to be for someone like that to realize that everyone needed to be vulnerable at some point or another, especially when someone special came along. _

_All things considered, they did okay. He didn't think he'd ever live to see the day when Toph admitted to being in love. It was a lovely revelation she made, and it warmed him to know that they could both move on comfortably despite it all. _

Now everything had rebounded and they were right back where they started.

Aang smile fondly at her and nudged her one more time. She was trying hard not to smile, but Aang kept at it. He was yanking at small locks of her hair—silky, soft, thick, and long—by the time she finally relented with a grin and a sigh.

"I just," she began, physically struggling with her words. "I hate dreaming," she said lamely. "It's too…honest, I guess. Reveals too many intrinsic things about you and I don't want to have to deal with it. It brings up too many old memories and reminders of things that can't be, and it upsets me. So if I don't sleep, I don't dream, and I don't dwell. Problem solved."

Aang winced. "You know, except for the whole sleep deprivation issue," he reminded her.

She lifted her head high and shook her head. "I can handle it," Toph said.

No she couldn't, he immediately thought. He knew, because he couldn't handle it either. Something invisible was gnawing at him, and he couldn't see it, hear it, or feel it to know what it was. It was hard to run away from something that couldn't really go away. Not easily, anyhow. But Aang certainly didn't have the answers to these questions, and from the look of Toph, he was certain that she didn't have them either. It's why she came out here to breathe and why he came out here wishing that he could just take off and fly and _leave_. There was nothing else that they knew. Running away failed, so remaining stationary in the most unfamiliar bog of anonymity possible was all that remained.

It was depressing when Aang really thought about it. But in Aang's opinion, people had the right to be selfish and unreasonable at some point. In this city with no one around and no one to tell them how to solve their problems, Aang found it was far too easy to suggest a cowardly, quick fix solution to their problems.

"You know," Aang replied after a long bout of silence. "I picked up some stuff today that might help with that."


	2. Part 2

**A/N: **Thank you so much for the reviews and the follows so far. Here's the next part! Don't be afraid to leave a little comment if you loved it, hated it, wish I could do something better, or just want to say hi.

(p.s. is anyone else having issues with inserting line breaks, or am I just incompetent?)

* * *

_Part 2_

* * *

Whatever illegal means the healer went through to get this sleeping draught from that apothecary, they must have been pretty spectacular and bordering on sadistic, because whatever was inside the concoction was some potent stuff.

After Aang had walked Toph back to her room on the fourth floor with a box of five vials in her hands, he decided to take the sleeping draught right away and let himself read for about an hour, figuring that that would be how long these sorts of things usually took to kick in. Amazingly enough, he was barely awake for five minutes before he already felt his limbs grow heavy and his eyes begin to droop so much that he physically couldn't open them any wider.

In a matter of what was probably only ten minutes, he was already dead to the world and curled up on his bed on top of the sheets. It was only after he had woken up to the sun high in the sky that he realized he fell asleep. If it was really already noon, he must have slept for at least ten hours. He hadn't done that in years.

Aang couldn't recall any vestiges of a dream like he usually could, which he couldn't tell if he was grateful for or not. He could do without the occasional nightmares that he still had from the war, but it was strange to just not dream at all. Toph, however, expressed a few mornings later how absolutely wonderful the concoction was. She surprised him as he was leaving the hotel in the morning—or afternoon, as it turned out—by grabbing his shoulders and jumping straight on to his back, something she was privy to do whenever she really wanted to freak him out. He was only barely able to catch his footing and grab her thighs so that she didn't fall when she started exclaiming how well she slept.

"Nothing!" she expressed happily. "Absolutely nothing. Plus, I don't think I've ever slept this long and this much in my life."

The monk had to agree that Toph at least looked better. There was no correcting the dark circles under her eyes that would probably be there for a while, but her skin looked a little bit more flushed, and she was at least smiling this morning and acting much like the annoying and loudmouthed Earthbender he knew. All in all, he thought she looked rather charming when she got a good night's sleep. "I can see that," he laughed. "You think you can get off my back? You're not seventy pounds anymore."

She started complaining about how there were plenty of other more pleasant ways to express that she was an overweight cow—"I didn't say that, you maniac!" Aang complained—but dutifully jumped off of his back and sighed dramatically. "I liked it better on the ground anyway. You're not exactly conducive to the needs of blind Earthbenders are you?"

Aang rolled his eyes. "Sorry I'm not an all-accommodating vehicle." A whistle from behind him alerted his attention, and he saw the same woman who checked him into the hotel jut a thumb to the side and mouthed for him to get out from the front of door. Aang hooked a finger into the crook of Toph's elbow and walked her to the left and into the street amongst the other city folk.

"What happened?" Toph looked up at him curiously.

Aang slowed down for a moment and looked up as if he were trying to remember something important. "We were loitering," he mentioned offhandedly.

"No, I know that," she clarified. "I meant why are you dragging me this way?"

Aang hummed and looked down a side street before shaking his head and continuing down the avenue. "You want to have lunch with me?"

Toph frowned in thought. "Lunch? Why?"

"Just because," Aang answered simply, smiling when he looked down another bend in the road and gently led Toph in front of him by her shoulders. "I'm hungry, you're probably hungry, and there's not much else for us to do. Unless you had other plans that didn't involve me."

For some reason, that comment caused Toph's cheeks to flush slightly. It _might_ have been because it was sort of humid outside today and she was getting hot, but he doubted that profusely and preferred to dwell on the possibility that he might have embarrassed her because that made him smile. She ceased to be charming and started to become rather adorable when she tilted her head back, reached her arm around to touch his heart—as if she needed absolute confirmation that he wasn't lying—and seemed far more shocked than she probably should have been at the sound of a friend inviting her to lunch. That was something friends did, right? It was just a meal. They hadn't seen each other in a while. That wasn't crossing any lines was it?

She bit her lip again, and this time he openly recognized that he probably let his eyes linger for a lot longer than was probably appropriately platonic. "I mean…" she hesitated for a moment before she cleared her throat and looked away with a slight frown. "Whatever you want," she shrugged disinterestedly. "We might as well. But you're paying," she warned him.

Aang didn't really mind that much. Considering that he got turned down the other day and was having an all around dull few days before, this would certainly add for a pleasant change. Plus all the sleep he had gotten the night before was doing a brilliant job at invigorating him and encouraging him to get up and do something.

He had finally found that small restaurant he was looking for—a small family owned establishment that he overheard a couple talking up yesterday when he was walking back from the bookstore. Apparently their dumplings were to die for and the prices were something out of a dream. Plus it was quaint and quiet and there was a smaller chance of anyone randomly recognizing the two of them despite their Fire Nation disguises.

They were led to a double table in the back of the store right near a long window that overlooked the middle of the city where the large Ozai statue used to sit. After spending twenty minutes trying to figure out what to order—Toph was far too impatient to wait for Aang to look through all the ingredients in every dish to make sure there was no meat in any of them—they were both eating in comparative silence and finally enjoying a somewhat normal and surprisingly pleasant afternoon after what seemed like years to the both of them.

Toph pointed her chopsticks at Aang. "So does the dish meet your impeccable standards?" she asked sarcastically.

Aang reached over the table and pushed Toph's hand down. "Don't do that! It's rude," he admonished. "And as a matter of fact, they didn't really cook the vegetables quite the way I liked them. And the rice isn't seasoned quite right…" Aang trailed off, staring at his plate with a longing look.

"I'll alert the media," Toph deadpanned.

Aang laughed. "How's your butchered animal?"

The girl smirked and picked up a piece of pork. "Absolutely delicious. Fresh meat, just the way I like it." She made a show of chewing on her food with gusto and even making appreciative sounds from the back of her throat when she swallowed, which caused Aang to roll his eyes and flick a piece of rice at her.

"Now who's being rude?" Toph complained.

"I was given due cause," Aang grinned back. "Besides, I'm allowed to act out once in a while. Just like you're allowed to be a sweet little ball of sunshine and joy," he smiled brightly, reaching over and pinching Toph's cheek. She frowned and tried to bite his hand before he pulled it away.

Toph returned to her food. "So where did you get that stuff, anyway?" she asked, changing the subject. "Seems kinda…sketchy. You know. Not up your alley."

"Let's just say your keen eye has sort of rubbed off on me," Aang replied cryptically.

Toph's eyes widened and her smile started to grow. "That's a little out of character for you, isn't it?"

"I've been sleep deprived for weeks," Aang excused. "I cannot be held accountable for my actions."

"So says the Avatar. I'll hold you to that."

"I've no doubt you will."

For some reason, after their meal, neither felt the particular need to do anything other than walk around the city aimlessly until he came up with a better idea of what to do. Aang realized that Toph technically had no obligation to stay with him during his wandering. He sort of forced her to have lunch with him and expected her to cut out afterwards and run off and do whatever it was that she was privy to doing during her existential vacation, or whatever it was she was calling it. He wasn't really sure. But it filled him with a bit of pride that she unconsciously decided to follow him for the rest of the afternoon and stick close to his side to boot.

At times, he would gently brush his arm against hers if only to remind her that they were standing incredibly close to each other and looked rather…"chummy," to quote Sokka. But every time he did it, she just nudged him back, almost as if to say, "_Yeah, I realize we're standing this close. It's on purpose. Don't be stupid_." Or maybe she really didn't notice and he was just imagining strange things, as he tended to do whenever the noble girl was around.

Huh. When did that start happening?

Well into the afternoon, they wound up sitting on the front porch of a sweets shop that they ran into, sharing bags of sweets that they had just purchased with whatever money they had leftover from lunch. It was oddly reminiscent of those days when they ran around this same city, running everyone with a pulse bankrupt. They were laughing through the store, garnering stares from other patrons and not caring, and acting like total children. At one point, Toph had shoved rock candies down Aang's shirt, and Aang had returned the favor by sneaking wrappers into Toph's bun using his Airbending without her realizing it. He wound up making an entire wreath of plastic before she noticed and started pelting hard candies at him.

Maybe it was the work of the draught they took, but whatever giddy, childish mood they were in beforehand seemed to crash down into a sort of serene camaraderie as they sat on a lonely bench, sweltering under the heat that seemed to have amplified now that they were stationary. Aang—seeing as how he couldn't exactly take off his long sleeves—opened up his shirt and let the light breeze cool him off as he polished off the last of the cookies he bought. Toph stripped down into her tube top and piled her hair on top of her head in a horribly haphazard way that left a lot of loose curls to brush against the nape of her neck. The baby hairs that she had towards the crown of her head were frizzing slightly in the heat and Aang couldn't help but smile and think it made her look sweet. He finally realized that he was openly admiring her, but decided that he was too tired and too comfortable to do much about rectifying it.

They were halfway through their cookie stash when she turned to him with an oddly dreamy and thoughtful look on her face and told him, "Thanks."

Aang turned to stare at her. "For what?"

She shrugged and turned her gaze upwards, the sunset reflecting odd colors from her eyes. "I was in a rut before you came and cheered me up a little. You were the last person I expected to be able to get me up and about."

"I think 'rut' is just a bit of an understatement."

"Well, you weren't exactly an epitome of light and energy either," she argued weakly, no doubt due to the heat. "If anything, the complete opposite coming from you is a bit disconcerting."

"No one was more disconcerted than me," Aang admitted. "I guess that's what the monks meant when they said that you immediately know the moment when you don't recognize yourself. It's usually the time to start stepping back and reevaluating."

Toph snorted. "You know, as full of wisdom as your genealogy is, it's not really known for providing specific roadmaps, is it?"

"Definitely not," Aang agreed. "Gyatso always said that enlightenment is personalized. I can't tell you how to fix yourself just like you can't tell me how to fix me."

Toph remained silent, soaking up his words, as she was privy to do whenever Aang managed to quote his lessons and get deeper than she thought he would. "Well that's oddly depressing…"

"Think so?" Aang wondered. "I feel like that's the only way to tell if you've really done anything worthwhile. The worst thing you could ever do is base yourself on someone else's requirements." Thinking on it now, that was probably his own mistake: acting based on the preconceived idea of the rest of the world rather than really stepping back and thinking about what it was he really needed.

"You can't fix a machine without knowing how the parts work," Toph answered. "If you happen to lose one part, the whole machine malfunctions and you can't continue until you recover the missing part. Fixing is the last step. There's a lot of stuff in between that you have to work out on your own. Sort of sucks that even the assembly is a solo mission."

Aang nodded. "True. But do you really want someone else muscling in on that for you? Seems like a personal thing." Toph tended to get into the hypothetical whenever she was trying to avoid an issue. He was afraid of calling her out on it like he usually did because she seemed strangely mellow and open at the moment, and he didn't want her telling him something she didn't mean to slip out.

Toph must have suddenly realized where her ramblings had brought her, because she suddenly brought some candies in her mouth and took a long time rolling them around with her tongue to the point where Aang thought that Toph had no further opinions on the subject. Suddenly, she sighed. "I don't mean for someone to help me with the actual assemblage," she elaborated. "Just…someone to offer a hammer and nail when I need it."

Aang turned his head sharply towards her. Well, _that_ was certainly news to him.

He treaded carefully. His thoughts treaded back to how happy and in love Toph was a year ago and how he sort of hoped in the back of his mind that this was still the case. "But you're on your own," he stated.

She laughed bitterly, something she only used to do back when she still hated her parents and someone accidently brought them up. "Yeah," she replied shortly. "All on my own."

Something about that statement seemed wistful, like there was an undertone of something else that he wasn't being let in on, and Toph rarely sounded wistful, mainly because there was very little that girl ever really regretted or missed. He would know. He always got a good look into her head and into her heart since they were so candid with each other, just like they were now. If there was one thing that Toph always prided herself on, it was that she never looked behind her. If something fell apart, it was just a matter of salvaging it along the way. She didn't dwell. Or maybe she just never found reason to.

Suddenly, he felt like his thoughts were hitting too close to home, and he found he couldn't help replying. "Yeah. Me too."

That definitely warranted an incredulous look from Toph, and he would have laughed at the comically shocked look on Toph's face, because there was rarely anything that Aang could say to her that could truly shock her and get her to flounder around for something to say. But there it was, out in the open: he wasn't as good at hanging on to normality and expectations like he thought he was. He thought that maybe after all of the struggling to do his duty and sort through all of the chaos that had been suddenly thrust upon him, he could perhaps take advantage of the one lovely thing in his life and hang onto it like a beacon to make up for the mess he had trudged through.

But even that wasn't guaranteed, and he understood the necessity of having a person to hand you tools and wipe your brow while you set to work fixing what was broken.

**OOO**

"Do you think they're ever going to get home?"

Aang couldn't bring himself to get up from his position on his back. Plus Toph's legs were draped over his stomach as she laid perpendicular to him, and it was just too much effort to move her legs. Too hot. The sleeping draught was making him listless now that it was late and he was getting so used to taking it. It was an odd feeling—not quite laziness, just a lethargy that went past his tired muscles and seeped into his mind. He wanted to move, he couldn't. Toph had said something a couple of days ago: "It's like when you're losing too much blood. You just can't bring yourself to expend energy." He didn't quite know how _she_ knew that, but _he_ definitely did, and had to agree.

He drummed his fingers on the roof and had to concentrate extremely hard—he would never be as good as Toph at this—and just barely managed to see two figures approaching the hotel and turning the corner, their steps heavy and cross-crossing each other's. They were holding onto each other and were making loud boisterous comments about the buildings all moving and changing shape.

Oh and he would have normally jumped down there and helped them get home—because, no, they probably weren't going to get home anytime soon—but, he didn't even feel like reaching over and adjusting Toph's heel that was digging into his ribcage. He shrugged and shook his head. "Maybe in a couple of hours," he commented. "This city's not that big."

She didn't respond right away, but her voice was filled with incredulity when she eventually did. "Would have expected you to show more concern. Or at least some admonishment. They're drunk. You hate that kind of stuff."

Aang laughed darkly. "I know," he admitted. "I just feel…off. Like nothing I'm doing is helping."

"But you're not doing anything. That's the point," Toph reminded him. Aang almost laughed. She was amusing when she was too straightforward.

Aang stretched his arm out and tried to grab at the moon. "No, I mean helping me," Aang explained. "It's all very confusing, the emotions."

Toph's hair was let out of its bun, so she was tying silky locks of her hair into knots only to have them slip right of them again. "What emotions?"

He struggled to explain, and in the distance he could hear the couple tumbling on the asphalt for the third time that night. "I don't know how to explain it. It's just…I go from being so high up to being so down to the ground sometimes. It's like I'm masking something. I'm not doing something right."

Toph started braiding and unbraiding her hair. He hadn't noticed she liked playing with it before. Did she even notice she was doing it? "But…we've been having fun though, haven't we?"

Aang hesitated to answer her. Were they?

_No, we are. We were having a lot of fun,_ he decided. Something about stealing all the sleep they weren't really meant to have put them in good moods in the afternoons. For the past week they had taken to just getting outside and _doing_ things. Stupid things, admittedly, but it certainly felt nice for them to go outside, not have to deal with too many crowds and business, and just indulge in a little bit of childishness with each other.

They often revisited bakeries and sweet shops and spent all of their money on food when they were hungry, and just played around trying to count the different choices when they didn't feel like getting sick that day. They would have races through the city sometimes, charging through the streets and even going so far as to inconspicuously bend themselves underground to create secret passageways and tunnels to make shortcuts and to get to the finish lines faster. It had gotten to the point where sometimes, entire races took place underground because of all the shortcuts they had bended over the past few days. Aang said that Toph had the advantage over him because she was the better Earthbender, but that he had just as fair an advantage because Toph's footsteps were loud and the sound always carried.

Quiet lunches were always spent in the corner of quiet restaurants and teashops where they bent their heads close and just spoke. The strange thing was that it was never about anything serious. It was always about jokes that they came up with off the tops of their heads, games that they invented, and foolish people watching from the sidelines. It was very easy to spot them since they were the only two in the restaurants chuckling and giggling to themselves in the corner.

And then the ends of the days were spent laid out on benches or lawns on parks. Aang loved those parts of the day the most. He felt content and at peace, and loved listening to the random thoughts that entered Toph's head that she decided to voice aloud: new Earthbending tricks, the annoying couple in the room next to her, the bakery she wanted them to check out tomorrow, the fact that she was starting to actually like the hot weather…

But then the evenings turned to this. Aang wished it was this that would go away.

Aang squeezed Toph's knee. "Of course we have. I haven't had this much fun since we were twelve. Maybe even before that," Aang admitted quietly, sighing through his nose.

Toph hummed in her throat and Aang saw her smile. "That's a lot of fun."

"I know," Aang agreed wholeheartedly. "It gets addicting after a while. Then you forget what you're supposed to be doing."

"How many days has it been?" Toph asked aloud.

"Over a week since we've been here. And where are we?"

Toph sighed heavily and removed her legs from over Aang's stomach. He accidently made a sound of protest, not meaning to reveal how much he enjoyed the position and how much comfort the act of rubbing the pads of his fingers against the smooth skin of her knee brought him. But he was startled when Toph shifted so that she was shoulder to shoulder with Aang and rested her head against his. She was staring up at the sky and he could vaguely see the stars overhead reflected in her eyes.

"I see your point," Toph muttered. Aang hummed in agreement.

"Well," Toph questioned him, "what are we supposed to do?"

Aang didn't quite know how to answer that. Well, no, he _did_. But he avoided talking about that very topic the entire time he was here because it was just so damn messy to bring up. But maybe that was part of the hurdle. You had to muddy up certain things in order to get them out into the open. There was certainly the possibility that Toph wouldn't take it well at all. In fact, he predicted her clamming up and refusing to say anything. But perhaps now—when their guards were lowered—he might be able to get away with it.

"Why'd you run away here?" Aang asked her finally.

The monk could literally feel Toph's muscles tighten at the sound of the question and he knew that he had certainly pushed the limits of their companionship. It was a good stress to put on it, he believed. Aang had done enough running away in his childhood for him to start it up all over again.

The Earthbender shook her head and nudged his shoulder with her own. "You first."

Aang frowned. "I _asked_ you first."

Toph rolled her eyes and banged her fist on the ground. A small disk of Earth about the size of the coin popped out of the ground. Toph rubbed her thumb over one side of it so that one side was smoothed out and the other was rough.

"We'll flip for it. Call it," she said as she flipped the coin into the air.

Something told Aang that Toph cheated, or maybe he really was unlucky, but the coin landed smooth side up and Aang groaned in annoyance at having to confess something personal first.

Aang sighed and folded his hands together on his stomach. "Ugh, I don't even know where to start…"

"At the beginning," Toph answered vaguely. "Where did things start going bad?"

Aang bit his lip and thought and tried to work out the past year and all the troubles that started coming along with it—his drained energy, troubles with his work, the desire to just pick and leave everything behind and never come back…it all started from somewhere. Something changed from that happy wedding when everything was all put together and perfect to now when the things were muddled and confusing.

"Katara and I broke up two weeks ago," Aang blurted out finally.

Toph leaned over and flicked Aang on the forehead. "Doesn't count, moron," Toph admonished. "You already hinted to me that you guys weren't together anymore. There's got to be more to it than that."

"A breakup isn't enough for you?"

"Breakups happen for a reason, don't they?"

Aang rolled his eyes and huffed out another large breath, realizing that he really didn't mean to lose that coin flip. He understood now how Toph felt whenever Aang started to come up with questions to ask her. All he felt like doing was being evasive and vague for long enough to get her to forget that she even asked a question. Toph did that to Aang and it worked like a charm, but when it came to personal information, Toph's attention span was impenetrable.

Aang closed his eyes—he didn't want to see Toph's reaction—and relaxed his muscles. "Well, most people don't know that I broke up with her."

There was a long stretch of silence in which Aang heard absolutely nothing—not even sounds of drunken conversations from the couple they were watching earlier. The air around him was stagnant and there was absolutely nothing to distract him from the sound of Toph's intake of breath since he _knew_ she thought that Katara had been the one to end that relationship—because that's always what everyone thought. He understood why. But the explanation that followed was a complicated one and he was still figuring out how to phrase it in his head while Toph reacted.

He felt her head turn towards him by a fraction. "Why?"

Aang tried to collect his thoughts into some form of coherency. "…the love just…faded out. I kept stoking it and trying to bring it back to life, but it just kept getting dimmer. So I ended it."

He could feel her eyelashes brush against his cheeks, and he knew that his eyes would have fluttered closed at the sensation had they not been shut tight already. "You're going to have to be a bit more specific than that," she said.

"I don't know how to be," Aang offered. "I still don't know exactly what happened, only that I knew it was the right thing to do and that it needed to happen."

"You had to have felt something," Toph pushed. "These decisions just don't happen on a whim. I seem to remember that you were practically over the stars when you were dating her. Forgive me if I think the sudden change in attitude is a little disconcerting coming from you." Not surprising, Aang thought to himself. A lot of things about his sudden attitude were disconcerting.

"It just wasn't what I really wanted," Aang relented. "It wasn't what I needed. Once the high wore off, there wasn't really anything to feed off of."

Toph pinched his side. "You're being cryptic again, Aang," she said seriously, falling back into his name.

Aang reached up and grabbed at his hair and just let old thoughts spill out of his mouth. "I was lonely, okay? After losing my friends and my family back in the Air Temple…literally losing _everyone_ I _ever_ knew…it messes with you. Nothing seems fair, and when you have the responsibility of the world on your shoulders, everything looks empty and unfamiliar…and suddenly you don't know what you're really fighting to protect or stand for."

None of this was ever said out loud—to anyone. It wouldn't hit him until later how very serious this moment was for the both of them and how much he really put out into the open. All he knew was that old insecure thoughts were bubbling up and he hated himself for all the catches in his voice he was allowing to push through. "Katara was the one constant thing I had to latch on to. The first one. That was important. She was with me through everything. Of _course_ I was going to fall in love with her. She was everything I didn't know and wanted to know about this new world I woke up in. She was my first friend and she believed in me. At the time, I thought that was enough to last."

Toph sighed and shook her head. "But it wasn't. You put her up on this pedestal that wasn't strong enough to support the weight you were putting on her."

Aang nodded. "It was love. It still is. I still love her," he repeated to himself, convincing himself of what he had been battling with over and over again. "I just can't be with her. It isn't the right kind of feelings. I adore her for what she's done for me, but I confused adoration with romanticism. There was nothing romantic about my feelings for Katara. I didn't notice it until recently when she wasn't permeating my every thought and attention like she used to."

"So who was?" Toph asked innocently.

That was right around the time when his sleep started falling off. He thought too much, and one of his main worries was the answer to that question: if Katara wasn't the one who dominated his thoughts and actions, then who was? Would he ever meet them? Did he already? Was he actually making a huge mistake in ending the one stable thing he'd had since his entire world flipped itself on its head after he woke up in the South Pole? He didn't think people realized just how much his decision bothered him. It affected his work to the point where he couldn't concentrate, he couldn't sleep, he was irritable, and he really just wanted to be left alone. It was upsetting that something he had put his heart into wound up being too fragile to use. Katara seemed to take it well considering she was on the receiving end of the split. Aang should have been relieved. He wasn't, and it showed. So he ran.

Aang shrugged. "I ask myself that every day," he answered. "It's why I'm such horrible company. It's all I think about."

"You know they say that you shouldn't think too much, because you might hurt yourself," Toph chuckled.

Aang rolled his eyes and nudged her for the joke, but decided that there was indeed some truth to the sentiment. "Funny. Your turn."

Toph was still laughing. "My turn, what?"

"Don't play stupid. A deal's a deal," Aang frowned.

Toph pouted. "It's late."

"That's really creepy…don't do that again." Toph smacked him on the cheek and left Aang in laughter. "No but seriously," Aang recovered, "fair's fair. When have I ever judged you when it came to personal agendas?"

"I never actually promised that I would say anything," Toph reminded him. "Just that you would go first."

Well, Toph _was_ the queen of loopholes. "Whatever you say, cheater." And Aang left it at that.

A very long silence stretched and for a while Aang thought that Toph had no intentions of saying anything. He couldn't say he wasn't disappointed, but he wasn't at all surprised. If anything, there was always tomorrow or the day after that for talking. It didn't seem like they were going anywhere for a while anyway. Perhaps that was a good thing. If topics like this were still hard to talk about, nothing was accomplished and going back would have solved nothing either.

Aang was pulled out of a light trance that consisted of staring into the sky when Toph breathed in through her nose and let out a very shaky breath, as if she were preparing herself for the crack in her voice that was all too noticeable when she muttered, "I messed up."

There was no explanation for the compulsion Aang felt to lift Toph's head so that he could wrap his arm around her shoulders and let her rest more comfortably against his shoulder. What was even stranger was that Toph allowed it and made no attempts to berate Aang for babying her or assuming that she needed any form of help or comfort that she couldn't already award herself. It should have raised some flags for him or at the very least startled him in some sense, but the only thing that mattered was that Toph sounded upset, and he was finally getting a chance to hold her.

"Messed up how?" Aang asked her.

Toph exhaled harshly. "I dunno. A lot of good things happened at once. I wasn't used to it, so I ran with it and rode the good vibes for a while. Then when they stopped I was totally taken off guard. I should have known better," she berated herself, grinding out her last sentence in admonishment.

Aang's fingers were unconsciously running through her hair. He had never known any of this. "Good things…you mean with your parents? Or with that guy you were seeing?"

Muscles immediately tightened underneath his fingers, and suddenly Aang knew that he had hit the nail on the head where her troubles were concerned. It suddenly made sense. Toph was practically floating on clouds just like he was about a year ago when she was still very much unavailable and otherwise preoccupied with someone else. She came here alone. Now it all made sense.

"I just…" Toph began hesitantly. Aang didn't push and waited the minutes it took for Toph to finally say what was on her mind. "My parents could have totally regressed. Locked me up, prevented me from seeing anyone. But they didn't. Hell, the tears in their eyes when they heard about what I had done…" she smiled for a moment, reveling in the memory. "It was great. And we _talked_…actually talked for the first time in a long time. They listened, and they heard what I wanted and it was amazing. I stayed with them, but I was free to do what I wanted. I loved them for that, and I will always love them for doing that for me. That's why…I wanted to repay them."

Aang furrowed his brows. "Repay them how?"

She shrugged in response. "Recently they wanted to introduce me to some people. Young men. Nothing set in stone, no expectations, just to see how things went. I was getting older. Other girls my age were starting to think about getting married. It made sense."

The image of Toph running around worrying about invitations and picking out her trousseau seemed so out of place that Aang couldn't help but smile. "You married? That would be a sight to see."

Toph smiled back. "I wasn't too crazy about it either. But I wanted to repay them in some way. They weren't pressuring me to marry anyone I didn't totally feel committed to, so I went ahead and tried to at least get to know someone. And it worked," she remembered fondly. "You knew all about him. He was all I could talk about for weeks. He was special. He understood me, listened to me, was humbled by the things I did and the things I said. He adored me, I could tell."

Aang waited for the follow up. "But?"

Her shoulders moved up and down and she moved closer to him. Her exhales were fanning out against the skin of his neck and he couldn't stop himself from shivering and shutting his eyes at the sensation. "He proposed to me," she admitted, and for a moment Aang was shocked into absolute silence.

He recovered after a few seconds. "That's a good thing though, right?" he asked.

But Toph shook her head. "I turned him down. I said no." Toph laughed humorlessly. "I think I broke his heart. I wanted to say yes to him, but I couldn't."

The story sounded so familiar to him—wanting to have something that would be good for you, but saying no to it anyway. He at least understood that feeling. But he would have thought Toph would be relieved to have gotten herself out of something she didn't really want. But she was broken up about, so much so that she wasn't herself anymore. So what did she really want? What did they both really want?

Aang tried to lighten the mood. "Marriage not your thing?"

Toph grinned into his shoulder. "Maybe. Who knows? But it messed me up for days. Couldn't eat. Couldn't sleep. Couldn't breathe in my own house anymore. I had to go…somewhere," she finished lamely.

Aang nodded. "You ran."

Her denial was a sight to see. She shook her head adamantly and insisted, "No, I didn't run—"

"Toph, yes you did," Aang told her. "I know you don't like to think so, but you did." He felt her about to shift away from in anger before he held her closer and said, "But there's nothing wrong with that! There's nothing wrong with needing space and needed to isolate yourself. Sometimes, that's the one thing you need." Aang swallowed, talking to himself as well as to her. "But you can't drop anchor here. Going and staying are two different things. There's no liberation in staying. You get stuck. You have to keep moving, Toph. You can't just keep staying here." _We can't keep staying here. _

Toph's jaw was set, like she was trying hard to stay unblinkingly detached like she usually did. Aang didn't see her cry often, but he made sure to take notice when she did. She was on the verge of it right now and was trying not to let it show. The Earthbender never dealt with frustration well, let alone frustration over something she didn't know how to handle. "I just…I wanted somewhere that was as isolated as possible so that I could think and forget about everything for a while," she explained. "It's just not working out quite how I thought it would be. The problem just got worse."

Aang wouldn't really understand the full meaning of that statement until later on. For now, it just seemed like she was upset that she was still here and not ready to go back home. But neither was he. At the very least, some sort of progress was made. The denial stage was left behind them, and they could only go forward. He was an optimist. He knew things would improve. In fact, he desperately wanted them to. Not just so that he would be happier and better off, but because he wanted Toph to be happier and better off. He liked it when she laughed. He liked it when she was full of energy. He liked it how when she was well rested, her skin glowed and she looked absolutely radiant. He liked it when her eyes crinkled up when she smiled. He liked her jokes. He liked her ideas. He liked her thoughts. He liked the feeling of her hair in his fingers…he liked…

_Oh. _

He liked her.

He _liked_ her.

The thought crossed his mind just as his face unconsciously leaned towards hers and pressed a quick, neat kiss on her cheek. She didn't pull away, and she didn't punch him like he thought she would have. A small lift of the corners of her mouth and a sharp inhale was the only reaction he got, but he was more surprised that she did nothing retaliatory against him for the simply little act.

Rather, she moved her lips to the side until her exhales started to furl against his own, and suddenly some strange feeling started to erupt in his stomach that felt a lot like the time he first got his courage up to kiss Katara. Something about having her mouth so close to his heightened his awareness and suddenly everything was on hyper alert. His arm was still wrapped around her, curling locks of her hair in between his fingers with the skin of his arm touching the skin of her shoulders. Her knee was pressed against the bottom of his thigh. Toph was licking her lips, and Aang was compelled to do the same. If things before weren't already confusing, they were starting to become very much so now.

Aang didn't anticipate Toph tilting her head up and pressing a kiss to his lips any more than he anticipated her fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt and holding him close to her. For a moment, his hands froze and he couldn't fathom how on Earth this was happening—was it even happening?—but then the warmth from her lips spread to his, down his body, and right to the tips of his fingers that then grabbed her hair gently and pressed her closer against him.

Really, he shouldn't have indulged in it. He should have run away from it. It wouldn't have added even more chaos to an already hectic situation. But the strange thing about kissing Toph was that Aang didn't know how much he needed it until he actually went and did it. It was slow and sweet and heated up by the building desperation to feel something that wasn't a source of disappointment. A tongue against his own, a soft bite of her lips, a soft moan in her throat, and his hand cradling her cheek were such simple things to take enjoyment out of, and there was no need to think about anything at that point. Everything became simplified in that one moment, and the mess that would no doubt happen afterwards must have been worth it, because neither of them felt like stopping.

That night, Aang didn't take the sleeping draught. He fell asleep after an hour of staring at his ceiling and replaying the moments of the past week that contained nothing but her.

When Aang finally fell asleep, he dreamed pleasantly for the first time in weeks. He dreamed of Toph.

**OOO**

Aang certainly didn't feel as well rested in the morning as he usually would have with the sleeping aid, but he felt a lot more lucid and willing to think about things more critically.

He supposed that the excitement of getting so much rest the first night was an excuse to continue on the excitement and avoid what the real problem was.

Suddenly, Aang was starting to wonder whether the real problem was whom he had been spending so much time around for the past few days.

It didn't make any sense, yet there it was clear as day. He wasn't sure how serious this _like_ of Toph was. That's all he was willing to call it, because anything else seemed to be pushing boundaries he hadn't brought himself to think about yet. He tried to think back to what he _thought_ he had with Katara and then compared it with Toph. Nothing matched up. It wasn't the same anymore.

With Katara, he wanted to spend every waking moment with her. She was this perfect figure that he wanted to worship every part of. He wanted to be able to have something that full of light and that full of beauty in his life so that he could hold on to it forever and have it happily guide him through the rest of his life.

Aang would never place Toph to that kind of height. Toph had trust issues. Toph was stubborn. Toph was loud. Toph was confrontational. But Toph was also lonely and desperate to find a place for herself in a world that wasn't very kind to her, and she was willing to dig through a lot of shit to do it. Her parents, her blindness, her insecurities…all of that was background noise to her, and in the end it turned her into a person that Aang felt he could learn more from than someone who would always remain to him the epitome of unrealistic perfection—simply because that's how his twelve year old brain had been wired. He didn't want to attach himself to Toph in the hopes of brightening his own life. He wanted to go out of his way to brighten hers.

He wanted to get her out of whatever funk she had put herself in and knock her back into the person he laughed and had fun with because, in the end, that made him happy. Because she made him happy. What he thought was just one of the closest friendships he had ever had the privilege of benefitting from, was actually just a slow segue into…something. He didn't know what to call it. But it was intense, and suddenly, now that he actually had the courage to realize things instead of avoiding them, it all made sense somehow.

Toph was what he wanted. He wasn't quite sure just what exactly he was aiming to gain from this wanting, but dammit he wanted to try and see what it felt like. The kiss from last night knocked his brain into overdrive. This was different. He had never felt this before. Maybe this was what he was missing. Maybe this was what he needed.

Aang stood under the awning of the motel like he did every morning as he waited for Toph. He was yawning, having not gotten nearly as much sleep as he was accustomed to, but he was relieved that it was at least due to nervousness and excitement rather than confusion and hopelessness. He was drumming his fingers against his forearms with his arms crossed over his chest as he debated just how he wanted to go about this. Despite all the coaching from Sokka he had gotten over the years, he really wasn't good at coming up with romantic gestures on the spot.

Toph came barreling out of the entrance to the motel a few seconds later, her eyes bright and her smile dazzling like it was every morning after a good rest. Aang immediately felt his heart race at the sight and couldn't believe how he hadn't noticed this attraction before. All of a sudden, little things were starting to become obvious to him and he couldn't help the heat that rose and spread all over his body when he looked at her like this.

He desperately wanted to kiss her again.

"So I was thinking," Toph rattled off, already walking to the park where they usually started their underground excursions. "We should up the stakes of this race a little bit. Take out your Firebending for a light source and do the tunnels blindfolded. It should be funny and—hey wait, aren't we going to the park like usual?"

Aang had grabbed her arm and started walking her in the opposite direction. His heart was beating against his chest and even though he knew she couldn't see anything, he didn't want to face her with a look that screamed of nervousness and embarrassment. Even though it was a ridiculous thought, it always felt like Toph was still watching him even though she was blind. Nothing was hidden from her for long, and he wanted to get this done quickly before she picked up on anything too strange.

He purposefully didn't answer her queries about where they were going until Aang found the perfect spot he wanted to talk in. Tucked away behind a small tea shop that they had visited once or twice before was a small square of benches, tables, and trees for people who wanted to sit outside. The shop didn't open up this area for another hour, which meant that Aang could ensure that the two of them had some privacy. He turned the corner and came to the back of the building where he walked the two of them against the wall of the shop and underneath an awning away from the heat of the sun. He kept his distance and made sure he was an arm's length away from her, but Aang already felt the compulsion to reach across and touch her.

"What are we doing here?" she asked, confused.

Aang sighed and tried to control all the thoughts that were threatening to spill out of his mouth. He kept his voice low. "You kissed me."

Her eyes widened a small fraction and her lips opened up a fraction. "What?"

Aang repeated slowly, "You kissed me."

Her breath caught in her throat and she was trying to push past the barrier that was preventing her from speaking, but all that was coming out was unintelligible noise that Aang couldn't comprehend.

"Why?" he finally asked, staring her down intensely enough that she would be able to feel the stare without having to see it. "Why did you do it?"

Toph looked down and struggled to find the words to respond to him. "I…look that wasn't anything…"

"That wasn't anything?" Aang mimicked. "What do you mean it wasn't anything? Did it not happen?"

Toph froze for a moment and looked up at him out of her habit of facing the source of his voice. But she shook her head and smiled in disbelief. "I can't believe you're choosing to focus on something stupid that happened last night when we were both—"

"It wasn't stupid!" Aang interrupted. "Whatever that was, whatever compelled you to do that and whatever compelled the both of us not to run away from it was anything _but_ stupid. Friends just don't kiss each other like that and not talk about it."

Toph's brows furrowed, and Aang could tell she was just starting to get irritated. "There's nothing to talk about. It was just…" she hesitated. "A spur of the moment thing. Reflexive. That's it. Like a hug. If it bothered you…I'm sorry," she finishes lamely.

Aang shook his head and chuckled humorlessly. "Right. Because when I'm sitting with Sokka and talking to him about something personal, the first reflexive thing for me to do is to reach over, grab his shirt, and start kissing him," Aang quipped sarcastically.

Toph frowned and crossed her arms over her chest in a defensive manner. "Never knew you as the type to resort to dry wit," she commented.

"You're rubbing off on me," Aang smirked. "And, as usual, you are evading the subject like you've been doing every single day since we've been here. It's why you haven't left yet, and why you feel like you can't. Something strange happens, and you refuse to face it—"

"Don't you talk to me about not facing difficult things!" Toph retorted harshly. "I face everything that comes my way. That's who I am. I don't back away from any challenges."

Aang smiled at her sadly. "No you don't," he agreed with her. "But you freeze up when you face things that scare you," Aang finally concluded.

Fighting alongside Toph taught Aang many things. One of the things he knew from the start was that Toph wasn't afraid of fighting. It was a simple physical battle of bad versus good and it was very easy to see the black and white aspects of it. Feelings frightened Toph to the point where she refused to correspond with her parents for close to a year because she was afraid what they were going to think of her and say to her once she explained to them how she really felt. The only reason Toph had even made it this far was because Aang had pushed her to say something. That's why he knew Toph was feeling something strange and unfamiliar to her. Aang knew evasive tactics when he saw them. Toph knew how to run away from feelings when they reared their ugly heads.

Toph couldn't say anything for a long time. "…I'm not scared of anything," she murmured unconvincingly.

"You know, for a human lie detector, you are a _horrid_ liar," Aang teased her, a smirk playing on his lips. "That's why you ran away. Something scared you so much that you had to get away from it as quickly as you could. You're doing the same thing again, right now."

"I told you I'm not scared because there's nothing for me to be scared of," Toph growled. "I was confused! I did something stupid. I shouldn't have done it."

Aang swallowed and tried not to look hurt. He had to admit, that stung for just a second. But Aang knew Toph longer and far better than anyone, and he knew when the girl was lying. Her eyes were just a little too expressive, she was fiddling with her armband, and she was purposefully leaning away from him. He didn't think she even realized she was doing it.

He moved closer and she pressed her back harder against the wall. "Liar," he whispered.

Toph's eyes hardened and she managed to line her eyes up with his by chance. "I don't think so."

So much denial. He didn't know how she managed to make it seem so convincing. He shrugged casually. "If you don't think so then it's perfectly alright for me to prove that, isn't it?"

"Look, if this is a game to you, I'm not playing," Toph argued. "Why can't we just forget about this?"

"Because I don't feel like forgetting it," Aang insisted. He leaned his face closer to hers, and he saw the shiver through her spine. "And I get the feeling that you care more about it then you let on." There was no reason for her to be so adamant in her claims that she felt nothing unless she was trying to hide something.

"You're delusional," she hissed.

Growing frustrated, Aang leaned his arm against the wall over Toph's head and moved his lips over to her ear. His purposefully allowed his breath to fan out against her earlobe, and he smiled when he saw her stand up a bit straighter and bite her lip as an afterthought. Her eyes were already snapped shut.

It was a bit of a chance, but Aang figured it was too late to bother being careful or subtle anymore. They'd been doing that for weeks. He turned to whisper in her ear. "If I'm so delusional…then you'll stop me from doing something you think is stupid, yeah?"

Toph's eyes opened in surprise at the statement, but Aang didn't give her a chance to respond to it before he pressed his lips to hers and felt the whole world around them fall away again.

Aang purposefully kept his arms away from her and waited for some sort of reaction. He prepared himself for a slap or a push or a strong bite and would back away when he got one. That much he was willing to promise himself. But something told Aang that Toph wouldn't do any of them, and he hung onto that hope that he wasn't crazy, and that he could finally trust what he knew he was feeling again.

He was about to give up and pull away when he felt an arm creep up his shoulder and around his neck. Aang was sure this was the beginnings of a choke hold or harsh yank, but then Toph tilted her head and opened her mouth a little and actually kissed him back. He couldn't keep his hands from moving fast enough as he tangled one in her hair and wrapped the other one around her waist.

Everything lovely and charming and completely irresistible about Toph could be perfectly encompassed in that kiss that Aang would never allow himself to forget. Toph's arms curled around his neck tighter and her other arm wrapped around his back and grabbed the fabric there as tight as a vise. It felt like she was afraid that he would leave if she let go for even a second, so she held him tight to keep him near, and Aang reciprocated by pressing himself flush against her body. He had always made fun of people who said that their partner's mouths tasted sweet or like honeysuckle, but he did understand the addiction that others had for the feel of another person's mouth. Aang couldn't stop himself from probing deeper and running his tongue over her lips, her tongue, the inside of her mouth, and anywhere else he could touch.

Toph—as if she suddenly realized that she should fight back as well—pushed back against Aang's lips and explored his mouth herself, causing Aang to moan at the sensation. She was an eager kisser, and her insistence sometimes caused their teeth to clash together before she would fall back into the rhythm of the kiss. But Aang loved the frantic, hurried, and desperate nature of their kisses—like the world was ending around them and they had to make up for a life's worth of passion in just a short, single moment together.

He was spurred on by everything she did, and when she moved her hands from his back to slide down his shirt along the muscles of his arms, he couldn't stop himself from groaning in response, sliding his hands down the swell of Toph's hips, and gripping them tight. Moving purely on instinct that he had never tapped into so furiously before, Aang ripped his mouth away from Toph's, pulled the fabric of her shirt away from her collarbone, and pressed a languid kiss right on the sensitive skin.

In the back of his mind, Aang made a note to do that more often as a long, keening gasp was the only warning he got before Toph's legs grew weak and nearly buckled underneath her. He quickly hooked a hand underneath one of her thighs and continued to drag his teeth and tongue across her skin, keeping the litany of gasps and sighs from spilling forth and allowing the heat that was growing all over Aang's body to pool lower and lower. It felt like she was melting right in his arms and all he wanted to do was to have her grip onto him tighter and feel like she couldn't anchor herself without him.

Suddenly, Aang felt Toph's fingers lightly brush against his jawbone and he immediately turned his head to face her eye to eye. She was doing that unconscious habit she sometimes had when she sucked her bottom lip in between her teeth, and slowly let it furl back out like a flower bud, and Aang just wanted to lean down and kiss it again. But Toph was still holding his jaw and running her fingers across his skin, and for a moment he was sure that she was going to pull his face down to her own and start the kissing back up again—

—until that thought was immediately burned to death as Aang suddenly toppled to the right and fell to the ground on his side.

Ah, there was the hit.

He should have known. Toph's right hook was pretty monstrous.

Aang could already feel his jaw throbbing when Toph stalked over to him and grabbed his collar and pulled his face close to hers. Even though he was sure she was going to hit him again, Aang couldn't help his eyes from roaming over every single little detail on Toph's face. He had it bad, and it happened so quick he didn't know how he would have been able to stop it in the first place. Even angry, she was stunning.

"What the hell was that?!" Toph practically shouted. "You just forced yourself—"

"Oh, stop it right there, Toph," Aang defended immediately, working his jaw in circles in order to soothe the pain that was still burning on the side of his face. "You can't lie to me and tell me I forced you. Or would you like me to remind you about the fact that you grabbed me and pulled me closer first—"

Toph let him go and let him fall back to the ground. She lifted her hands to her hair and gripped tight and he watched her look particularly puzzled. "Oh, Spirits, just stop it," she moaned. "This is crazy, I…" She hesitated, as if she realized she was getting overemotional and immediately squared her features. "No. I told you. Nothing."

Aang prided himself on being able to reel in his temper, but over the years he'd figured out that Toph was a true expert at bringing it out. He couldn't put a stopper on the rising volume of his voice, because he just didn't understand.

"Do you want to know what your problem is?" he accused her harshly, sitting on his feet and looking up at her eyes, which were now flaming in frustration. "You just don't care anymore."

That made Toph flinch, but she quickly recovered and decided to sneer at Aang instead. "You're one to talk. You were in just as bad a state as I was in. These whole two weeks it's just been us doing the same thing. What gives you the right to act all high and mighty around me?"

"Because I give a shit now!" Aang shouted. Loathed as he was to fall into cursing, it was the only method he could think of in order to properly gain Toph's attention and show her that he was as serious as he could be. Her eyes widened and her jaw snapped shut, her retort falling back down her throat. Aang closed his eyes, sighed, and toned down his voice. "I came here because I was scared to stop and wonder what was wrong with my life and what I needed to do and fix it," he explained. "Sleeping the days away and waking up with the sole purpose of just forgetting everything and living in denial doesn't solve anything. I'm finally figuring out what I want now."

Worry and apprehension started to show on Toph's body and she tentatively turned away from Aang too late so that he wouldn't see. "And what do you want now?"

Aang hesitated—still so consumed by so many thoughts that came so quickly but persisted so strongly—but stood up from the ground with his feet planted firmly and admitted, "You."

Toph's head couldn't have snapped in his direction faster. Her foot was flexing against the ground, probably trying very hard to notice a single falter in his heartbeat, but he knew that she wouldn't find one. For the fist time in a very long time, he was actually being sincere and he wanted Toph to be able to be the first to witness it.

However, dread fell over her features like a veil that was growing thicker and thicker by the second until Toph was backing away from him and looking positively panicked. Her head was shaking. "No…" she muttered half to herself. "No, no, you can't mean that, no. L-Look at you and Katara. The two of you were—"

"Running on feelings that manifested when we were children," Aang finished. "Something had always felt off with Katara, but I ignored it because…I thought it was just my imagination," he admitted softly. "But being friends with you, laughing with you, telling you things I've never told anyone, spending all these days with you no matter how much the two of us were trying to lie to ourselves…Toph, that's never happened with anyone else. I never found that in anyone else but _you_. You're my best friend, and you are so much more precious to me than you could ever know."

The fear didn't dissipate. If anything Toph looked about ready to bolt in the opposite direction. But Aang pushed forward, knowing he needed to get it out. "I-I know it's unfair of me to just…this is coming out of nowhere and I'm sorry, but…I just needed to tell you," he stammered. "And I'm not crazy. I know you have to feel something, don't you? Anything…" he trailed off.

He half expected an answer or admission, but the words were washing right over her, and Aang didn't think he'd ever seen Toph look so positively confused and uncomfortable in his life. He stepped closer to her and flinched inwardly when he watched her take a step back in response. She was swallowing lumps in her throat, and he could see the strain she was putting herself through to try and say something to him in response. He had put his heart out in his hands and he was just waiting for her to reach out and take it. However, it was a lot to expect her to just trust him with something so important. Aang realized that too late, and he couldn't have been more upset with himself. He came on too strong. He was insisting too much and putting too much into her head. He'd gone and scared her.

Aang was about to try and say something to bring her back to sorts in order to end the awkward moment—although he had a rising suspicion that him opening his mouth was turning out to be a very bad thing today so far—but Toph had already beat him to it and done exactly what Aang hoped she wouldn't do: she ran.

It took him a few seconds to register that she had actually sprinted away from him and wasn't bothering to look back or offer a retort to the huge emotional weight he just dumped right between the two of them. Aang snapped out of the shock and ran back towards the front of the store and looked up and down the streets. Despite the thin early morning crowd, Toph was nowhere to be found, and Aang had a hunch that she had used some discreet Earthbending to get away faster without anyone noticing her.

He sighed in frustration and dug the heels of his palms into his eyes. Of all the stupid things he could have done he had to go and do the one thing that would basically ensure that Toph would up and run away. She had just gotten done telling him that she ran away from her house to the Fire Nation after she was proposed to. He should have known that spilling his heart out like that at her would yield similar results, and now that he had gone and figured out his issues and found out why he was so confused the days following his breakup, he went and ruined the one good thing he wanted to have going for him and wound up taking four steps backward when he thought he had taken two steps forward.

Aang stared down the street and started walking back the way they had come. It was still early. He could still find her.


	3. Part 3

**A/N:** Last part, darlings~!

Enjoy!

* * *

_Part 3_

* * *

Two hours of scouring the city, and Aang had nothing. Toph really knew how to be invisible.

He had walked up and down all of the main streets and checked all of the restaurants, taverns, and shops he could find. He walked through the large park in the middle of the city twice, and even went so far as the scale some of the roofs in the busier parts of the city in hopes that he would get a better view and see her. He questioned so many people that he was sure he had to have interviewed at least half the city. Aang even sat down on the ground at one point and tried to feel as far down into the Earth as possible to see if Toph was hiding underground in one of the tunnels they fashioned over the past few weeks. But over and over again, Aang came to dead ends. After finally hanging his head and giving up, he had fully convinced himself that Toph had picked up her bags, left the city, and gone somewhere else.

Of course, there really was no one else to blame except for himself. In his excitement and desperation to finally admit to feelings he had been ignoring for so long, he forgot to consider Toph's feelings as well. Now any and all hopes he had of finally pursuing something because he _wanted_ to and not because he felt he _needed_ to were dashed to hell, and Aang had absolutely no idea what to do with himself now. Was there even a reason for him to stay here anymore? Should he go back to Zuko and insist he was cured? Even though he had finally gotten over his doubts about his past relationship, Aang was sure that his mind wouldn't rest knowing that he and Toph had ended on bad terms. He had to find her and set things right. She couldn't have gone far. Maybe a neighboring town or city. If he left now, he could still catch up.

Aang ran back to the hotel and was about to turn sharply through the front door, but only barely stopped himself before he collided straight into the woman at the front desk he met that first night. Luckily, he didn't go and reflexively start Airbending and practically announce that he was the Avatar. Instead, he just managed to catch the armful of boxes she was holding before it crashed to the ground.

"Woah!" she cried out. "Be careful, would you? You're gonna kill someone. " She raised an eyebrow at him and smiled. "Whoever you're running after is not going anywhere."

Aang frowned and watched as she walked around to the side of the building. "How'd you—?"

"Please!" she cackled with her head thrown back for measure. "The people in this hotel who _don't_ know about that girl you've been running around with are in some serious denial," she gushed at him with a smile. She plopped the boxes down on the ground in the alley to be picked up later. "So, is she your girlfriend?"

The monk averted his eyes and probably looked like a little boy lost and abandoned when he answered. "…no…not really."

The woman propped a foot on the largest crate on the bottom of the pile and leaned her elbows on her knee. "Huh. Complicated?"

"You have no idea."

She shrugged and jiggled the box under her foot. "Well, she actually just ran upstairs like an hour ago. Looked pretty frazzled too. I don't know what happened but if you're—"

"Wait, she's _here!?_" Aang practically shouted. This was the first place he checked. The only obvious place she would be. Why was she hiding here?

The receptionist's eyes widened and she started walking back to the front of the building. "Calm down, hon. Yeah, she's upstairs. I didn't see her leave at any rate. Plus, she just dumped that little box down here and asked me where she could throw it out." She shot an annoyed look over her shoulder. "I only just got a chance to trash it."

Aang peered back at box that was sitting innocuously in the dim alley. "Huh…what was in it?"

She shrugged and started to step through the doorway. "Hell if I know. Bottles of perfume maybe? It's what it sounded like anyway. Though why any girl would have that much perfume is beyond—hey, what's wrong?"

Aang had already darted into the alley and started to wrench the familiar looking box. It was nailed shut with stone nails, and Aang subtly removed them with Earthbending before the woman raced back into the alley and peered over his shoulder. "What? Isn't it just junk? I didn't think it was anything important."

The Airbender didn't answer as to how this was actually crucially important. He was too busy pulling out the small glass bottles inside and staring at them in wonder. The sleeping draughts. They were sleeping draughts. At least a week's worth of doses.

Toph threw them all out.

Aang leaned back and sat down on the ground, ignoring how dirty and crusted in garbage it was. None of that mattered because just when he thought everything was messed up and totally ruined, there was a little glimmer of hope that was starting to come to life in his chest and he couldn't help but smile into his hand and shake his head in amusement. He probably looked crazy sitting there laughing at a box of what to anyone else was just some garbage, but all his panic seeped out into the air and he dropped his head into his hands smiling. "She's still here…"

The woman was confused. "Well of course she's still here, she hasn't paid yet. Wait, why would she be leaving? Did something happen between you two?"

Aang shook his head emphatically. "No, no…well sort of, yeah," he explained, brushing off his pants as he stood up. "But it's fine…I think it's going to be fine."

"You _think_?"

Aang laughed uncaringly, too relieved that he wouldn't have to trek the globe anymore to find Toph. "With her, you never know. But at least I think I know what to do now."

**OOO**

It was a couple of days before Aang saw Toph again.

Not that he was surprised in the very least. For someone who claimed she hated dreaming, she was probably doing a lot of it right now and was probably loathing every minute of it. It meant she had to think and dwell, and as strange as it sounded to say so, Aang knew how much of a pain that was. But either way, he supposed that it was better than Toph doing something completely drastic like packing her bags and running off halfway across the world to another out-of-the-way town so that no one could find her—not even Aang. But thankfully the receptionist kindly informed him that Toph hadn't left—and if she did, she always came back.

Now that their daily excursions had halted to a complete stop, Aang had taken to going to the hawk post and delivering messages to Zuko telling him that he was doing better and also relaying some ideas he had about quieting some stuffed shirts in the Fire Nation who were mad about raised taxes going towards rebuilding damaged parts of the country. His head wasn't in a haze of confusion. That had passed. Now it was just a waiting game.

Aang was walking around the corner back onto the main road when he ran into Toph. Literally.

He was looking down, and she must not have been paying attention to where she was going and didn't see him coming because they bashed foreheads together so hard they both stumbled back a few steps and immediately brought hands up to their bruises.

Aang hissed and started massaging the pain away when he blinked up and noticed that it was Toph that he ran into and that she was in a similar position, rubbing her hand across her forehead.

"Head in the clouds as usual, Twinkle Toes," Toph grumbled in annoyance. "Didn't know you were hardheaded too."

Aang falling into a response to her quip was just all too natural. "Says the stubborn Badgermole herself," Aang shot back.

Taking in her appearance very quickly, she already looked different. She looked tired, like she had spent half the night awake and had only fallen asleep out of sheer exhaustion. Looks like her dreams were keeping her up again just like they were before. But at the very least, this time she wasn't hunched over and passive and looking altogether depressed. She had enough energy to snap back at him and manage a frightening glare that Aang was all too familiar with. Her shoulders were squared, her chin was up, and her hands were crossed defensively across her chest as she made another retort about him being a whiny little boy who couldn't take responsibility for his own mistakes.

"You know most people just manage an apology and go along their way instead of arguing with the other person," Aang complained.

Toph smirked. "Yet, as you've no doubt discovered, I am not most people. So I'll stop arguing when I want to and not when you tell me."

Aang couldn't help but smile at the familiarity of her abrasive attitude that was so many leagues different from the lethargic and detached Toph or the overly exuberant Toph that just wanted to get up, run outside, and _do_ things. He quickly realized that he preferred this Toph more. It kept things interesting, plus he had to owe his prowess in debating and biting repartee to Toph. She was a great source of practice and so much fun to rile up.

He didn't bother thinking of the implications of such a request when he asked Toph, "Do you want to go grab a bit of lunch?"

Toph's eyes widened slightly, almost as if she remembered the first time he had dragged her off to a meal, back when they were so willing to just forget they had a life to go back to and problems to resolve before they could. Among other things, he imagined. But she frowned and tightened her arms and appraised him curiously. "Why? This isn't a sit down interrogation or an 'I need to tell you something important' deal, is it?"

Aang rolled his eyes and adjusted the strap of the pack he was wearing. "I've already told you all the important things I had to say," he reminded her. _Unlike you, _was the unspoken statement left hanging in the air, and Toph had the decency to look guilty.

"Besides, why is it so weird for two friends to go out for some lunch? We've done it so many times before."

Toph raised a brow. _Yeah. Before you confessed that you liked me and kissed me senseless_, her eyes seemed to say, and Aang had to relent a little and understand her point. The tone of the offer was different because now they couldn't ignore that something between them was present in a way that it wasn't before. Suddenly, even simple things like saying hello to each other took on a different meaning.

An annoying side effect of not having your feelings reciprocated, but he supposed he should have seen this coming. The monk sighed and nodded in defeat. "Alright fine, I get it," he acknowledged preparing to pass her and go back to his room and…work probably. "I guess I'll just…I don't know, see you around town or something. I'll just be—"

"Okay."

"—in my room or…wait, what?"

Toph fidgeted on her feet and inhaled deeply, standing as straight as she could manage. "I said okay. I'll go to lunch with you," she repeated.

He frowned and scratched at the cap itching his scalp. "Don't hide your enthusiasm from me. Really. I can totally take it."

Toph shoved his shoulder. "Look don't be sarcastic, I said I'm going with you so just…take it, alright?"

_Well, she's certainly all calm and under control this morning_, Aang noted to himself. The stubbornness was appreciated, but only to a degree. Still, he knew that if she called her out on the behavior she would probably smack him across the face and stomp off in the opposite direction, and he didn't want to waste the chance to take advantage of her actually agreeing to the last thing she probably wanted to be doing.

Committed to being as civil and understanding as possible, Aang walked them to the nearest restaurant, one that they had frequented more than once since their stay here. Toph must have remembered it, because she didn't need Aang to read her the menu before she ordered one of the dishes on the lunch special. She was curt and started sipping on her tea in order to keep her mouth busy so that she wouldn't have to fill up the awkward silence. Aang ordered a vegetarian dish and handed the menus over to the waitress, leaving him to dissipate the strange mood before the two of them. He hated to admit it, but nothing between them had ever felt this uncomfortable.

He cleared his throat and picked at the sleeve of his shirt. "So is everything…okay with you?"

Toph kept her eyes down, either staring blankly either into her cup or down at the wooden table. "Yeah, fine."

"Sleeping well?"

She hesitated for a moment and caught her lips in between her teeth. "Yeah, just great." Such a liar. She was exhausted he could tell.

"Good, that's…good," he finished lamely, suddenly very unsure of how he was supposed to proceed.

Toph cleared her throat. "So, um, you've been keeping busy I guess?"

Aang nodded, jumping straight into a topic he could at least elaborate on past 'good.' "Yeah, just corresponding back and forth with Zuko on some things. I heard from the Water Tribes regarding some outstanding issues that we've decided to put off until certain people were present and available. That might keep me busy for a few days too."

"Sugar Queen's department, isn't it?" She was looking just past his ear but he could tell she was eyeing him carefully.

Aang shrugged nonchalantly and peeked over Toph's head to see where the server was with their food. "Probably, yeah. If it's international affairs, she's usually present."

"Do you work well together?" Toph asked, clicking her nails against her cup distractedly.

Aang furrowed his brows as he waved the server over, but still answered the question. "Well we _did_, but I honestly don't know how our dynamic has changed. I mean she was the one who sent me the letter about business, and nothing in her tone has changed since…you know. Well, minus the mushy paragraphs," he amended. "But I think she should be fine. I think I left things as positively as I could."

Plates of food were placed down in front of them and Toph immediately started digging in, not responding to his answer right away. Aang ignored his food for the moment and asked, "What have you been up to?"

Toph swallowed and licked at her lips. "Nothing much. I go underground for a few hours and practice some Earthbending, but other than that not much. Just sit in my room and think a lot. Kinda gets lonely," she trailed off.

"Oh," Aang answered. "Well, maybe you should go out and do something," Aang suggested, referring back to some old advice that the healer had given him. "You can't just stew alone in your room all day. Sometimes company helps."

"Says the monk holed up in his room all day," Toph commented back at him with a smirk. "Follow your own advice. I'll bet some people are dying to see you. Katara, Sparky, Snoozles…"

Aang darted his eyes to her again, but didn't see her acting strangely. Just quietly eating across from him like she normally did. Still, he answered slowly. "Yeah, I guess," Aang agreed. "But I think I'm fine now. Besides, I get more done when I'm left alone."

Toph pursed her lips but nodded. "Whatever you say."

Nothing more was exchanged between the two, and they finished their meals in a silence that Aang thought was nothing short of excruciating. They used to be able to fill up hours with talk. Now, they couldn't even bring up their daily activities without making it sound forced. Add in the fact that Toph looked and sounded better but was acting beyond abnormal and you had a situation that was far too complex for Aang to handle on his own.

Aang asked for their plates to be cleared and asked Toph if she was interested in any dessert. She waved off the comment and insisted on getting whatever Aang wanted, not caring whatever that happened to be. She went back to keeping her head down and her hands interlaced on the table and didn't offer another suggestion. He kept his eyes on her as he muttered to the server to bring them two rose petal fruit tarts.

"You know," Aang began casually, "I was thinking of traveling to the Earth Kingdom for a little bit. I haven't seen the Earth King in a while and I think I might want to visit him. I was wondering if you wanted to come with me. It might be worth it to go back to someplace familiar for a while."

But Toph chuckled while she was still chewing on a particularly sweet bit of the tart he ordered for her. "And you're inviting me? Ray of sunshine that I am?"

"I just thought you might want to go a little closer to home," Aang explained. "Just a suggestion."

"Don't worry about it," Toph insisted. "I'd probably just be a killjoy anyway, right?"

Aang frowned again and actually had to put his utensils down when he regarded her next. "I'm not suggesting that at all. I was just trying to be nice and extend an invitation to you. If you don't want to come with me that's fine."

Toph glared across the table. "Don't take it personally. I'm just saying you could afford better company than me. Take someone nicer or something. Hell I'd bet Katara would love to go with you."

Aang smiled humorlessly and pushed his plate away. "Stop that."

"Stop what?"

"You bringing up Katara into the conversation so much. Stop it. I see what you're doing."

Toph put her utensils down as well and grinned sarcastically at him. "Well then you must be as blind as me because whatever you think you're seeing is not there. I'm just making a suggestion. She'd be better company," she explained. "If you're in such a chipper mood now, you might want someone with a more positive attitude to enable you."

Aang was sure he looked affronted as he lifted his tea to his lips. "I need someone to enable me?"

"Yeah," Toph shrugged. "Not in a bad way, just…someone to match your mood. I'd just be a downer for the whole trip so you might as well leave me here. You and Katara seem more compatible with the whole optimistic outlook on everything that's practically infectious. In fact, I'd bet she—"

Aang slammed his cup down on the table. "Cut it out already!"

"What?!" Toph exclaimed in annoyance.

Aang leaned over the edge of the table and glared at her fiercely, not caring that she couldn't see it and hoping more that she could feel it burning through her. "Does everything I said to you mean absolutely nothing to you?"

"What are you talking about?" Toph asked tiredly.

Aang reached across, grabbed Toph's hand in his, and squeezed it tightly. "What do I have to do to get it through your thick head that I could care less about hanging out with Katara, going on trips with Katara, and trying to get her to _match_ to me. I don't need to be with someone who's perfect. I need someone that I can be honest with. Someone that makes me happy. And that isn't her," Aang emphasized with meaning. "It's you."

"Don't be such an idiot," Toph answered back looking visibly upset. "Katara is literally the best thing that happened to you. She's saved your life more times than I can count."

"So have you!" Aang countered back. "Besides that has nothing to do with anything."

"Yes it does!" Toph insisted. "She was in love with you. And you were in love with her."

Aang shook his head. "It wasn't the same kind of love. I know that now. That's why I broke it off with. I made the decision, Toph! I knew what I was doing."

"You're throwing away the only good thing you've had in over a hundred years!" Toph argued with him, and suddenly Aang was starting to put some terrifyingly illuminating pieces together. "She is perfect for you!"

Others in tables nearby were starting to turn their heads towards them, and others were already shushing at Toph to keep the shouting down so that they could eat in peace. Aang quickly stood up and slid into the booth next to Toph, ignoring her protests. He leaned his head close so that his voice was barely audible, trying to keep the conversation a private affair but more to talk to her while she was close to him so that she could really get a good read on whether or not he was fibbing.

"Why do you think that I don't care about you?" he asked honestly. "That I'm making a mistake in liking you. I'll admit, I don't exactly know where this attraction will go. I have no way of telling the future." No matter how much he believed in the feelings he had at the moment, they were still new and impossible to see to completion this early on. But damn it, he was going to try and see where this would go because this felt right to him.

"But I'll tell you that Katara never made me feel like this," Aang continued with conviction. "I can't act like a little kid with her. I can't tell jokes and play pranks and expect her to laugh along with me. She can never push me to constantly be better and be stronger and be more caring like you can. All this time when I wanted to be near you, to protect you even though you didn't need it, to listen to you, to help you, and to be happy with you…I thought that was me wanting to be your friend." He took her face into his hands and leaned in closer to her, their noses barely brushing. "It was nowhere close. It's more than that. But…forgive me for being too stupid to see it until now. I care about you, Toph. So much. And I just wish you'd see that."

Aang pulled her in for a kiss before she had time to protest, this time less to prove a point and more because it felt right in the moment. It wasn't rushed, frantic, and messy like the one behind the teashop had been. It was such a simple and innocent kiss that it shouldn't have felt like much, but for some reason his heart swelled and his elation rose to the skies on contact. He was trying his hardest to be sincere. This wasn't a case of random attraction placed coincidentally after a breakup. This was real affection for someone he had cared about for years. And when he pulled away from her and stared into her eyes that were far too expressive for someone who couldn't even see, he knew that all of that talk about her not wanting any part of this was a brave act.

Still, she shook her head—as if exiting from a trance—and pushed herself away from him so violently that she stumbled out of the booth and had to hold on to neighboring chair for balance. "No," she pleaded, blinking and panting. "Just…stop confusing me."

But Aang refused to relent. "What's so confusing about a kiss?" he questioned with confusion. "Why do you keep pushing me away? Why do you keep pushing _everyone _away?"

Toph's grip on the chair was crushing and he could see her arm trembling from the force of it. The restaurant was already starting to fall silent and heads were starting to turn, so Aang left their food unfinished and slammed ten silver pieces on the table before he dragged Toph out the restaurant before they brought any more attention to themselves.

"Let go of me!" Toph struggled in his grip. "I didn't agree to this so you could interrogate me!"

"Do you blame me?" Aang shouted over his shoulder as stalked down the road. "I don't know what to think anymore. You're not giving me anything to work with!"

Toph scoffed and snatched her hand back. "Well excuse me for not jumping on you the minute you drop a bomb of a confession on me! I'm not obligated to give you what you want."

Aang turned to her and glared fiercely at her. "You don't realize how unfair you're being, do you?"

"_I'm _being unfair?" Toph repeated scandalized.

"Yes! Extremely," Aang insisted. He rubbed a hand across his forehead and dropped his hand in defeat. "If you really didn't reciprocate anything…if you're really so set on the fact that I made a mistake in pursuing you, why did you kiss me that night on the roof?" He asked her desperately. "Why didn't you push me off the minute I got near you two days ago? You let me get close only to push me away again." He threw his arms out in a show of surrender. "You're the one confusing me!"

Toph opened her mouth to interrupt, but Aang didn't let her. "Not only that, but it's like you want me to change my mind. It isn't enough that you claim you feel nothing for me, but you're trying to suggest that I don't really feel anything for you." Aang laughed humorlessly and shook his head in disbelief. "I mean, who _does_ that if not someone who's purposefully hiding things from me and isn't telling me something?"

Toph's hands were trembling and she immediately hid them in the crooks of her arms so as not to give anything away, but her silence was enough for Aang. Always with secrets, always with hiding things from other people, always scared to open up to others. It was the single most frustrating thing about her, and he wasn't about to let that be the reason she went and made a fool of his feelings.

The monk set his jaw and asked, "Is that what happened with that noble you were going to marry?" He immediately saw her head snap towards him and her entire body tense up. This was a low blow—an extremely low blow—but he couldn't stand being in the dark anymore. If he was going to be rejected, he wanted to know why, not be fooled into turning his back.

"Shut up, Aang," Toph growled between gritted teeth. She said his name with so much self control that he knew he was really hitting a nerve. "I mean it."

"Did you do the same thing? He showed you how he really felt about you and you panicked and pushed him off? Is that what this is?" he continued, letting his mouth run away with him.

"Aang!" Toph shouted desperately. "Don't make me knock you out! I said stop it!"

"I'm not stopping! Not until you talk to me!" Aang shouted back to her. "Just tell me why you pushed him away…why you pushed me away. I can't stand this hot and cold act with you. I'd leave you alone if only you gave me a straight answer."

Toph was floundering around for something to say. "Twinkle Toes, please, just…just cut it out. I don't want to have this conversation."

Aang wasn't relenting He stepped closer to her. "Why didn't you marry that man?"

"I'm not answering that," she bit back, looking down and hiding her face behind her long bangs.

"Was it because you didn't really love him?" Aang continued. "Were you scared to commit? Did it happen too fast?"

"Aang!" Toph screamed.

"Hell, I don't know, were you just pulling him along because it was fun?"

"STOP IT!"

"Then answer me!" Aang screamed at her, holding her shoulders in an iron grip.

Toph let out an inhuman sound and thrust both of her fists forward, pulling a thick slab of Earth from the ground that connected to Aang's gut and sent him reeling back ten feet. The pain started to furl through his entire body and he could already feel the bruise forming on his stomach. But he propped himself up on his elbows and looked at her in shock. They were supposed to be going incognito as Fire Nation citizens. She just Earthbended in front of a crowd of people. He could already hear them muttering to themselves in shock.

"What's an Earthbender doing dressed as Fire Nation?"

"She looks so familiar…you don't see eyes like that just anywhere…"

"You idiot she's blind!"

"Wait! You don't think she's…"

Toph was ignoring all the talk around and was visible trying to quell her rage. Tears were prickling at the corners of her eyes and she was blinking back the moisture. Katara had said she had only ever seen Toph cry once, and Aang himself had only seen such a rare event on one other occasion himself. His eyes were close to popping out of his head at the sight. But he didn't dare say anything or move from his spot on the ground as he watched Toph walk towards him.

She rubbed her eyes furiously across her eyes and wiped off the tears that were so close to trailing down her cheeks. Her face was turned straight ahead, her shoulders were squared, and she spoke calmly.

"I didn't marry him because I hadn't gotten over you yet." Toph shook her head and smiled sadly. "I _still_ haven't gotten over you yet."

With that, Toph walked down the road, leaving Aang sprawled on the ground and frozen in shock.

**OOO**

Going on the roof was probably a very bad idea—mainly because that was exactly where Aang knew Toph would be stewing in private. He waited until the middle of the night to even brave walking up the rest of stairs to the very top of the building. He even stood seated on the stairs for about an hour, going through everything in his head before he made an appearance. There was no guarantee that she was even sitting there, but he at least prided himself in being able to predict her habits. If he were Toph, he would go somewhere where he could breathe. He remembered her telling him that she couldn't do that anywhere else.

Aang pushed the door open and immediately removed his hat as the heat from outside hit him. It was terribly dark outside save for the moon offering a small bit of light outside. Faintly, on the other side of the roof, he could see Toph sitting on that same ledge she was accustomed to occupying every time she came up here. She was kicking her feet against the side of the building and was bending her space bracelet into different shapes—something she always did to calm her down and cheer herself up.

There was no doubt that she had already felt him, but the fact that she wasn't shouting at him or asking him to get out of here was as good a sign as any that he could have hoped for. Still, he walked slowly and cautiously across the roof until he was standing right next to Toph, his toes hanging just off the edge.

One time, Sokka had made it a point to say how dangerous that was whenever he caught Aang doing it. Katara always sided with her brother, saying that it made her nervous whenever Aang stood at the edges of cliffs and roofs whenever he wanted to think—it didn't matter that he was an Airbender. But whenever he couldn't grab his glider and fly off somewhere, this was the next best thing. Whenever he stood like this and looked down at his toes, it always looked like he was standing in mid air—the closest he could get to the feeling of soaring through the air. Flashes of his first night here in the city immediately hit him, and he wondered how everything got so confusing.

Aang allowed for the silence to pervade for a few more minutes before he spoke up. "I tried to squash the rumor that you were in the city as best I could. Said you were a friend visiting from Omashu. A few people bought it."

Clearing her throat before she spoke, Toph asked, "But not everyone?"

The monk shook his head. "I'm not that good at lying. That's your department."

Toph chuckled and offered a small smile. "Yeah. You were always terrible at it. Remember when we messed up Zuko's topiary garden after an Earthbending match?"

Aang laughed at the memory and nodded his head. "I think I babbled off some nonsense about an Earthquake that only the two of us felt."

"Which was still half the truth," Toph reminded him. They _were_ showing off who could make the ground rumble the loudest.

The memory lingered in Aang's mind and guilt immediately started to wash over him. For someone who was so set on having fun with his friends and living as carefree as possible, he also made himself a promise that he would never let anyone have an ill thought about him. An unrealistic goal, but one that he pursued valiantly. Then he went and made his one true friend—no, more than a friend—reduce herself to tears.

He turned to her and whispered, "I'm so sorry."

"No, don't you dare," Toph stopped him. "You didn't do anything wrong. I should be apologizing to you."

Aang sat down next to her and let his feet dangle over the edge of the building as well. "I was cruel to you. I can't excuse that."

Toph shrugged and leaned her elbows on her knees. "Yeah, well. Sometimes that's all that works. Zuko always told me that I tend to laugh off anything that anyone says to me so long as it isn't an insult or a personal subject." Toph laughed and tucked her bangs behind her ears. "At least it got my attention."

Aang looked down at his hands. "Did you mean what you said?"

She turned her body towards him and spoke clearly. "Yeah. Every word of it."

Immediately, Aang felt his heart soar. All the stress and insecurities that were clawing up his throat and tightening up his chest immediately released their grip until he could finally take in a deep breath of air and finally know that he wasn't just imagining things. Stuck in the disbelief of such a surreal confession, he looked at her earnestly and asked quietly, "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I don't know," Toph muttered, sounding just as lost as she looked.

Aang reached across from him and took her hand in his. She blinked for a moment, but let him take her hand up to his lips and press a small kiss on the backs of her fingers. He rubbed his thumb across her knuckles. "Toph, please. Tell me."

There was a look of fear for just a second—like she was debating just closing up again and forgetting that she had even said such a thing to him. Maybe he was just seeing emotions that he couldn't' really decipher. But he was relieved when she moved closer to him until her knees were touching his thigh. Toph didn't let go of his hand, and instead started tracing out patterns along his skin and following the lines on his palm that she had taught him how to read a long time ago. The skin on her forehead was bunched together and she stared down in concentration.

"I don't know when it started," Toph began. "I think it was after Sokka practically risked his life to go save his girlfriend. Whatever stupid little fascination I had with him was shot to pieces right then and there. I didn't mind it much. I mean, I knew that he was taken and I wasn't about to try and pretend like I had a chance. It was a stupid crush, you know? It went away."

Aang chuckled at that. "I figured you liked him," he smiled.

Toph shrugged in a nonchalant matter, as if admitting that there was nothing she could do about such a thing. "That's when I started bothering you in the afternoons at the temple so much. Besides Sokka, you were the only one I could really talk to easily. It was like breathing with you. You talked, I listened, and you just…understood me. There was never any doubt in my mind that you were humoring me. You were genuine around me. That's something that I can't say for many people."

Aang remembered that day when he was meditating one of the atriums in the Western Air Temple and Toph knocked a perfectly aimed pebble against his temple, asking if he was willing to talk for a bit. It was something that he had never expected out of her, but he was more than willing to oblige. He even remembered their first conversation that day: the explosive fight that Katara and Zuko had that morning over breakfast. Fleshing out the details of what was said turned into making fun of their faces contorted into rage that then turned into the two of them trying to mimic the fight to the best of their memories. It was an afternoon that left them sprawled out on the floor and clutching their stomachs from laughter. That was a memory that Aang looked back on fondly, and it was an event that encouraged their daily talks by the fountain every afternoon right before lunch.

"I always looked forward to when you'd interrupt my meditating to talk," Aang reminisced, squeezing her hand.

"Me too," she smiled. "Every single day. It actually got so bad that sometimes I'd shirk off chores and let Sugar Queen rip on me afterwards just to go see you. It was getting bad. At first I thought it was just that I really loved having you as a friend."

Aang immediately saw her face grow apprehensive, and he squeezed her hands, urging her to go on.

"It wasn't until you and Katara were together for a few months that I realized us constantly hanging out as friends didn't feel friendly to me anymore. I was starting to really like you. More than just that stupid crush I had on Sokka. I mean I was severely…" She paused and sighed in frustration. "…I cared about you more than I cared about anyone else."

There were no words for a confession like that. Part of Aang wanted to grab her and kiss her all over and show that _yes_ he felt the same and there was no one else to come in between that anymore. But Toph continued on.

"But you were with Katara," Toph sighed deeply. "So of course all I could do was start comparing. I'd hear everyone say how gorgeous she was, how kind she was, how good the two of you looked together, and how happy the both of you were. There was no way I was going to come in between that. I knew that I had to get over you too. It was only fair. That was around the time I decided to go back home."

"That was the day I flew you over to Gaoling, right?" Aang asked her.

She nodded. "Mmhm. I wanted to apologize to them. And like I told you, all went well, and I wanted to repay them for the kindness. And that's when I met him."

Aang watched her smile sadly to herself and her fingers on his palm stilled completely. "It was…sweet with him. Comfortable. He really liked me. He was always taking me out to dinner in the city, coming over to have meals with my parents. We even sat out in the garden some nights getting our clothes all full of dirt and just talked. It wasn't just to make my parents happy. I thought that if I tried hard enough I could forget about you and maybe move on to someone else. But at Zuko's wedding…it felt too right being with you. I got really scared. That's why I never really fell back into contact with you when you left for Ba Sing Se after that. I thought that I could replace you so that you could be with Katara. Because…I thought that you deserved her over me."

Denial was on the tip of his tongue to assure her that none of that was true, because being with her on the roof of Zuko's palace at the wedding felt right and comfortable to him too. But he held back the comment. Rather, he let the shock of a few hours ago wash over him again so that the enormity of her statement could really hit home and make an impression. "You couldn't marry him because you were still stuck on me."

"Horribly stuck on you," Toph lamented. "I felt terrible. Spirits, I heard his breath catch in his throat when I told him no. I mean…he was so excited about marrying me. And honestly…" She hesitated for a moment, debating whether or not she could dare admit such a thing to herself. "I think I could have done it. I think I could have married him and settled for a sweet marriage. But I couldn't do that to him. I would have only been giving him half of me. That wasn't fair."

Aang took both of her hands in his. "So you ran away."

Toph nodded and cleared her throat. "I thought that if I spent some time alone, I could finally come to terms with the fact that I couldn't have you." She laughed to herself. "Then you mess everything up by showing up at the same hotel in the same city in the Fire Nation."

Aang shrugged. "Sorry about that."

"No, no, I thought it was gonna be okay," she insisted. "I could condition myself to just be friends with you again. At first it was hard…I mean I wasn't sleeping because every time I dreamed, it was almost always about you. I was torn up. I didn't want to think about you because the feelings always resurfaced. But then you gave me those draughts and they…I dunno it made me sleep a sleep that let me forget about my dreams about you and sleep off the stress of what happened before I came here. I could just focus on the now and just let myself be friends with you. Just friends."

That's why she was so happy to spend time with him for so long. They both forgot about past and future and just focused on the two of them in the moment. After being so distraught, such a thing was refreshing and welcomed. There was no way that Aang could ever hold it against Toph for wanting to latch onto that.

"Then I told you I broke up with Katara…that I never really loved her like I thought I did," he reminded.

"Reflexively, I kissed you because I thought that it was my chance to have you for myself," Toph confessed. "But I just couldn't believe that such a picture perfect relationship like that was over, and that you were the one that ended it. I got defensive. I thought you were messing around with me. I tried to push you away because it was just too good to be true. It's _still_ too good to be true."

Aang caught his lip in between his teeth and stole a look at her face. She wasn't angry, and she wasn't dejected. She looked contemplative, almost as if all of this was just one large mystery that she didn't have all the clues for or one large puzzle that was missing a piece. There was no denial and no desire to run away. She was finally done with all of that. She was just apprehensive. After being denied something for so long, to see it land in her lap must have seemed so surreal. Aang could definitely understand how that felt.

"You wanna know what Gyatso told me one time when I was younger?" Toph nodded at him, ears and heart open and listening. "He told me once that love is like a friendship caught on fire. Of course, I was ten and I didn't understand a word of it, but now it makes sense."

"What do you mean?" Toph asked.

"Katara and I were never friends like you and I are," Aang explained. "Don't get me wrong, I still consider her my friend to this day and I always will. But she was always so maternal."

Toph scoffed. "Don't I know it."

"No, don't me wrong, it wasn't always bad," Aang amended. "But…sometimes I felt like she was always trying to protect me from my mistakes instead of helping me learn from them. She was always too gentle. If ever I needed a kick in the rear to get me to do something, she just couldn't do that. She kept me from getting hurt, and she was always passive aggressive when it came to me."

Aang smiled at her and pushed her bangs out of her eyes. "You were never like that. You were never worried about hurting my feelings or trying to sugar coat things. You were real with me. You always are. That's why it was always so easy to come to you with things and talk to you. You were more worried about getting me to see the things that I needed to see than about me getting hurt along the way. Because sometimes, you have to trudge through a lot of garbage in order to get to what you really need."

"And I'm what you need?" Toph asked incredulously. "You're sure?"

Aang shrugged. "It's what I came here to figure out. I spent so long just working and doing things for other people, to then come back and realize that the love that I had that was supposed to be helping me was actually more beneficial to someone else than it was for me. I felt unfulfilled. No matter what I did, it didn't feel like I was doing things for myself anymore. So I ran to think and just be with myself and take care of myself for a change. And I know you hate the whole idea of fate and destiny, but I don't think it's a coincidence that at that moment of realization, you pop up again. The very person I needed to let me be myself."

Toph blinked and breathed in a large breath without letting it out. "…that's a lot to take in considering I was practically tripping over my adoration for you for as long as I can remember."

"I don't mean to overwhelm you," Aang frowned. That was the last thing that he wanted to do.

She shook her head slowly. "No, you aren't. I just…" She trailed off, and Aang leaned in hanging on her last word, waiting for her to finish her sentence. But whatever she wanted to say was lost if she even had anything to say to him at all, because suddenly he was feeling her fingers brush up against his jaw line and her lips were meeting his in a sweet but very short kiss. It shouldn't have felt like much of anything, but just the fact that _Toph_ was initiating it and _Toph_ was finally willingly kissing him made his emotions soar and caused him to melt straight into her lips.

Toph pulled away too soon and suddenly looked extremely embarrassed—a look that he certainly wasn't used to seeing on her but could definitely grow to get used to. She was about to push him away, but Aang grabbed her elbow and slowly pulled her closer to him until she was pressed against his side. He tipped her chin up gently and kissed her back firmly. Her hands immediately shot up to circle around his shoulders and he couldn't resist the temptation to bury his fingers in her thick hair.

Everything was slow and drawn out, but Aang couldn't even bring himself to indulge in more. There was a feeling of tenderness and longing that he had never felt with Toph before, and he didn't want to let go of such an all-consuming warmth, especially when Toph was reciprocating so beautifully. Suddenly, everything emerged with clarity and Aang could all of a sudden imagine being with Toph like this for far into the future. Such a desire for companionship and closeness had never been so strong with anyone else before, and Aang had no intentions of ever letting it go anytime soon.

There wasn't any way that Aang could tell how long they had sat wrapped around each other like that, but Toph eventually pulled away and bit her lip in apprehension as she fixed her bangs that immediately fell back into her face.

Aang chuckled and helped her pull her hair back. "You just…?"

"Oh, shut up," she scowled playfully. "I'm trying to be romantic here, and you're ruining it."

"You. Romantic? That I have to see…"

"And what, that whole speech wasn't good enough for you? I practically spilled my heart out to you."

Aang smiled and pulled her closer to him. "Well then I guess you're just going to have to do a better job at convincing me then, aren't you?"

Toph's eyes were half lidded and she smirked while curling a hand to the back of his collar. "You know, I was always prided for my stubborn persuasiveness."

"I'm sure you were."

She gripped tighter. "And you _definitely_ don't want to see me when I get too enthusiastic."

Aang smirked and thought that he so definitely _did_ want to see her get that enthusiastic. But he shut her up and kissed her again before she started filling up valuable time with more of her competitive streak.

* * *

**A/N:** And that's all, folks! Thanks for reading this (abysmally long) tale. Loved it? Hated it? Wished I'd done something different? Leave me a comment. They're all lovely to read through.

Until next time!


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